Frank DuFresne: Look, I found something really weird at here Blood Gulch Outpost Alpha.
Vic: Roger that, what did you find?
Frank DuFresne: It's... it's like... uhh... it's like a thing...
Vic: It's like a thing. Okaaay, dude, thank you for the update. I'll be sure to alert the chief of staff...
Frank DuFresne: Sorry...
Vic: Move to DefCon 1.
Frank DuFresne: I'm a little dazed... it's a big thing... it's purple... it's a big purple thing...
Vic: Use your words, dude.
Frank DuFresne: Look, I don't know, it looks like some kind of alien artifact. Do the aliens have, like, a home base or something here?
Vic: I don't know, dude... why don't I just consult my extraterrestrial travel guide for you. Oh, look! They have a great series of alien bed-and-breakfasts there! Lucky you.
Frank DuFresne: Never mind. I'll just figure it out myself.