- Young Memory Rick: Morty?
- Rick Sanchez: Oh uh, hypothetical grandson we go on adventures with.
- Young Memory Rick: You're one of those creeps who moves in with abandoned adult Beths.
- Rick Sanchez: It's more complicated than that.
- Young Memory Rick: You live with a version of our dead daughter. It better be.
- Birdperson: For all your intelligence, you seem unable to know where you are wanted.
- Rick Sanchez: Buddy this is not a safe way to work on yourself. At this point I'd support you joining Scientology. I'll take the workshops with you, I'll get in the sauna with Travolta, I don't even care what happens. Let's get outta here.
- Birdperson: Don't you get it? I came here to end it all.
- Garage: Risk level: unacceptable.
- Rick Sanchez: If I die, your battery has a 600-year charge!
- Garage: Risk level acceptance: increasing.
- Rick Sanchez: Yeah, I thought you'd see it my way. Now factor in the 50% chance I'm lying and make sure I get back.
- Garage: Asshole: detected.
- Rick Sanchez: Takes one to make one.
- Rick Sanchez: Come with me!
- Birdperson: To... some place nearby?
- Rick Sanchez: Anywhere, everywhere!
- Birdperson: Rick, I don't expect you to keep fighting, but this war is...
- Rick Sanchez: Far from over, I know.
- [pulls out his dimension gun]
- Rick Sanchez: Dude, I shared this with nobody. But I can take you right now to the same battlefield in a universe where we lost, or another where we won, or another where the war never even happened. All equally real, all equally unreal. None of it manners.
- Birdperson: Then why did you help?
- Rick Sanchez: Because I respect you. And I wanted you to know you could respect me.
- Birdperson: Even though nothing matters?
- Rick Sanchez: Okay... you matter, to me.
- Rick Sanchez: You're down here bailing on the rest of us because you don't want to process your grief and shame like a normal person, by drinking and mistreating others!