- Nick: I'm sorry. By the time of the wedding they'll have known each other, what, three months? That's like half a baseball season. You cannot meet, fall in love and get married in less time than it takes to get to the world series.
- Geoffrey: Here's what I know: I know I have my life, I have my job, I have my friends, and a terrific collection of pornography. What do I need a boyfriend for?