Sullen (2008)

J. Lalonde: Jim Wisnewski

Quotes 

• Guy : Does ANYBODY know who the guy in the closet is?

  Jim Wisnewski : [sarcastic]  Yeah, his name's Chuck, I've known him for years.

  Guy : You know him?

  Jim Wisnewski : No, I don't know him, you fuckin' moron!

• Jim Wisnewski : [steps in mud puddle]  Goddamn it, I hate this place.

  Mike 'Schmitty' Smith : What're you talking about? It's a big house, in the middle of nowhere. With chicks. And booze.

  Jim Wisnewski : I was talking about Washington! I'm so sick of rain I could fuckin' puke, man.

  Mike 'Schmitty' Smith : You've been living here how long and you're just now noticing this?

  Jim Wisnewski : [just keeps going, ignoring him]  ... and God forbid, the sun comes out for ten minutes and I have some asshole weatherman - -sorry, asshole meteorologist - -telling me to conserve water because there's gonna be a drought. And if you mention how much it rains here, some asshole launches into this spiel about how great it is that everything's so green and how much shit there is to do outdoors. You know what I do outdoors? Run to my truck before I get fucking drenched. No wonder this is the suicide capital of the world.

  Mike 'Schmitty' Smith : Bullshit, WAS the suicide capital of the world. And that was only per capita. And that was in the 80s, I think. And if I was living up here in the 80s and it was muddy, gray, and shitty all the time I probably would've capped one myself. Jesus, now I'm depressed. Again. Change the fuckin' subject, will you?

• Guy : Speaking of parties, Schmit, when are you going to have us out?

  Mike 'Schmitty' Smith : Ah, I don't know about that. My weird ass, porn fiend neighbor complained last time.

  Jim Wisnewski : I thought he was a Mormon.

  Mike 'Schmitty' Smith : Mormon porn fiend, whatever - -he orders all kinds of fucked up shit off the Internet and they always deliver it to my place by mistake.

  [playing it up] 

  Mike 'Schmitty' Smith : One time I accidentally opened one of those packages. And it's a movie called "Johnson & Johnson", man. You'd never believe what these two dudes are doing in the shower with soap and shit, all rubbin' each other up and-...

  Jim Wisnewski : [cutting him off, quick]  They wash, rinse, repeat, the movie was over, change the fuckin' subject!

• Guy : [after a small earthquake has disrupted the party]  It's okay! I think it's gonna be all right!

  Jim Wisnewski : What if there's aftershocks, Mr. Wizard?

  Guy : Nah, it's okay, I've been through way worse than this. You guys ahead and mingle, I'll be back in a bit.

  Jim Wisnewski : [surveying the party; to Schmitty]  This party sucks!

  Mike 'Schmitty' Smith : [can't hear him]  What? Shots?