- Bart gets in trouble with Marge after she finds out that he has Denis Leary's cell phone and is using it to make prank phone calls.
- As the only kid in school not to own a cell phone Bart cannot believe his luck when he finds one discarded on the golf course by Denis Leary,which he uses to make prank calls to bars around the world. Marge gets a call from Denis,advising her to activate the phone's tracking chip,which will allow her to keep tabs on Bart at all times,but Bart gets wind of this and transfers the chip to a bird's leg. Consequently the family are led to Machu Picchu and a new appreciation of each other.—don @ minifie-1
- Ac 1:
When Principal Skinner makes a fool of himself on a freeway, Milhouse manages to catch the whole hilarious scene on his phone. He calls most of his friends to see Skinner getting beaten up by a drunken Barney, but doesn't call Bart. When Nelson asks why, Milhouse explains it's simply because Bart doesn't have a cell phone. Later on, Bart is taunted for missing out on laughing at Skinner. Bart asks Marge for a phone. She refuses and explains she simply can't afford to get a phone for him and also can't afford to fund a dream trip for Lisa to Machu Picchu because of the payments she has to make. Lisa makes the comment that they're used to disappointment since they're in this family and Maggie has a sign that says "Me Sad Too".
A depressed Bart takes a walk past the Springfield Glen Country Club, and is promptly hit by a golf ball. Angrily, he enters the golf course to hit the golf ball against the person who threw it at him; upon entering, it turns out Dr. Hibbert had accidentally hit him. Hibbert immediately pays Bart a dollar for retrieving the ball. Surprised, Bart takes the money and gets an inspiration: retrieving golf balls for money, in order to buy a cell phone.
A gleeful Bart is only $20 short, but his glee is cut short when Groundskeeper Willie discovers Bart is cutting in on his job. Willie confiscates all the golf balls, prompting Bart to return to his miserable mood. However, nearby, a celebrity golf tournament is underway. Celebrity Denis Leary (guest starring as himself) prepares to swing, but misses brutally when his cell phone rings at the same time. Angrily, Leary throws away his phone, which lands beside Bart.
Act 2:
He quits his job and takes Leary's phone all for himself. While going to inform Milhouse of his new cell, Bart receives a call from producer Brian Grazer (guest starring as himself), who asks Leary to star in the film adaption of Everyone Poops. Bart, realizing the phone belongs to Leary, pretends to be him. A mischievous Bart makes prank calls to bars all over the world(using names in sexual words pertaining to bodies), has all of Leary's money spent on New York Yankees hats and uniforms, among other pranks towards Skinner. Marge overhears Bart and Milhouse's mischievousness, and finally confiscates his phone. Leary recalls his cell, and Marge answers, apologizing for her son's behaviour. Leary, still angry with Bart's tricks, pretends to forgive him by advising Marge activate the GPS system on the phone and return it to her son, meaning she could track down his every move.
Somewhat guiltily, Marge activates the GPS system and returns the phone to Bart. Marge, with the help of the GPS system, is able to prevent Bart from watching an R movie, gambling at a horse race, and skating down steps and hurting himself. When Lisa learns about Marge's injustice, she's shocked by her mother's overbearing attitude that she tells Bart about it. Predictably, he grows angry, and decides to get revenge. He ties the GPS chip to the leg of a bird, which flies away.
Act 3
Marge, thinking the bird is Bart, assumes that he's running away from her and the house. While the family are going through a nation-wide search for him, Lisa realizes that the bird is the one they had been chasing the whole time. After checking research on her laptop, she discovers the bird is migrating to Machu Picchu, her dream trip they couldn't afford. She deliberately lets the bird go free, so the family can chase it to Machu Picchu and she could visit her dream trip as a family.
Bart relishes his newfound freedom during the day, but is horrified and frightened of being alone at night. When the Simpsons arrive in Machu Picchu in the morning, the family searches for Bart. Marge, despite being exhausted, won't give up, but Lisa convinces her to rest on an ancient sculpture, below the statue of the ancient Peruvian God of the Sky. Marge, quickly falling asleep, is pulled into a dream world where the God of the Sky shows her Ancient Peru. He teaches her how throughout history, parents who over-parented their children could never set them free, which was how they were conquered by the Conquistadors. Upon waking, Marge learns that she cannot over-mother Bart, and must let him take steps for himself. Homer discovers that the family had been following a bird the whole time, assuring Marge she knows exactly where Bart is.
Upon returning to Springfield, Marge asks him if he missed her. Bart says he didn't notice they were gone (for two weeks), so Marge, depressed, goes upstairs. However, upon reaching the stairs, she is stopped by him, who quickly begs her to never leave again. The episode ends with Lisa asking Homer, "Where's Maggie?" As it turns out, the family had left her in Machu Picchu, where she is being worshiped as a god.
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