The Angry Video Game Nerd (TV Series)

M.C. Kids (2006)

James Rolfe: The Angry Nintendo Nerd

Quotes 

• The Angry Nintendo Nerd : So then you go to Grimace's board. Here's Grimace, the big purple fuck. Look at his house, it looks like Barney the Dinosaur's testicle.

• The Angry Nintendo Nerd : So there's Ronald with his magic bag. Bag of hallucinagenic drugs. I always thought that clown was one scary motherfucker.

• The Angry Nintendo Nerd : Fuck balls.

• The Angry Nintendo Nerd : So then you gotta go talk to the Professor, another of Ronald's stoner friends. He tells you to find more cards, which just makes me wanna punch him.

• The Angry Nintendo Nerd : Kids will have the patience to figure that out. Especially the ones with ADD, such as myself.

• The Angry Nintendo Nerd : Toasty!

• The Angry Nintendo Nerd : Then you go to Birdie's stage. Stupid feathered fucking bird bitch.

• The Angry Nintendo Nerd : Oh God, look, a McFlurry man. Those guys are badass.

• The Angry Nintendo Nerd : A lot of people like to call 1-ups extra lives or free men. I like to call them life insurance.

• The Angry Nintendo Nerd : Ass balls!

• The Angry Nintendo Nerd : So there you go in Ronald's magic zipper, running around magical McDonald world.

• The Angry Nintendo Nerd : Now, who the hell is CosMc? Did they run out of McDonald's characters? What about Captain Crook or Big Mac? No, CosMc. I never heard of him. I guess there's nothing more you can expect but a shitty character like that. I mean, I bet the people who designed this game were paid minimum wage.

• The Angry Nintendo Nerd : So finally, when you get through all these crazy obstacles, you get up here. You walk all the way to this lava pit, and you don't have blocks to float over it. You can't go around it. So, what do you do? Guess you just gotta commit suicide.

  [character jumps in the lava; speaking in a high-pitched voice ala Mortal Kombat] 

  The Angry Nintendo Nerd : Toasty!

• The Angry Nintendo Nerd : Fuck farts.

• The Angry Nintendo Nerd : Here you are at the last stage. Robble, robble. You gotta get cards from Hamburglar.