Shay Jordan: Scream
- Vidéo
- 2007
- 2h
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Terrible stuff like this makes me wanna scream
In my current survey of Digital Playground, covering both its glory days and its decline, I had hopes (on paper at least) for this title from its peak years. Alas, the artist formerly known as Celeste (thank God IMDb has removed the confusion with the all-time breast queen -the real Celeste who preceded her) has directed an incompetent horror porn outing, virtually unwatchable.
Premise is anthology of horror vignettes, but the genre has deteriorated both in mainstream versions and in porn to near-nothingness in the decades since classic Brit films like "Vault of Horror", "Asylum" or "Tales from the Crypt" brightened up my local bijou.
DP contract model Shay Jordan sort of performs (she can't read or improvise dialog worth a damn) as lead in non-events meant to be supernatural in nature in an old dark house. The six sex segments are all lousy, quite a negative accomplishment as even in gonzo porn there's usually one redeeming vignette, all the better to facilitate masturbation and then throw the video away.
Audrey Bitoni, sporting smaller breasts than her later trademark pair just a couple of years later, looks bewildered in her scene confronting a maniac poorly played by Alec Knight. This particular vignette is so clumsily directed and unresolved it's as if director Bunny Luv/Celeste is making an avant garde statement -or perhaps it's mere incompetence? It begins with star Shay being chloroformed by Alec in a clumsy version of a thousand bad fetish videos in the "knockout" genre. But we never find out Shay's fate - quite an omission in a video about Shay.
Hillary Scott is wonderful eye candy in a couple of roles, but overall this is mindless crap below even gonzo standards. Takeaway: steer clear of the endless junk titles in this vein that DP released pointlessly while "Pirates" was filling the company's coffers with well-earned gold.
Premise is anthology of horror vignettes, but the genre has deteriorated both in mainstream versions and in porn to near-nothingness in the decades since classic Brit films like "Vault of Horror", "Asylum" or "Tales from the Crypt" brightened up my local bijou.
DP contract model Shay Jordan sort of performs (she can't read or improvise dialog worth a damn) as lead in non-events meant to be supernatural in nature in an old dark house. The six sex segments are all lousy, quite a negative accomplishment as even in gonzo porn there's usually one redeeming vignette, all the better to facilitate masturbation and then throw the video away.
Audrey Bitoni, sporting smaller breasts than her later trademark pair just a couple of years later, looks bewildered in her scene confronting a maniac poorly played by Alec Knight. This particular vignette is so clumsily directed and unresolved it's as if director Bunny Luv/Celeste is making an avant garde statement -or perhaps it's mere incompetence? It begins with star Shay being chloroformed by Alec in a clumsy version of a thousand bad fetish videos in the "knockout" genre. But we never find out Shay's fate - quite an omission in a video about Shay.
Hillary Scott is wonderful eye candy in a couple of roles, but overall this is mindless crap below even gonzo standards. Takeaway: steer clear of the endless junk titles in this vein that DP released pointlessly while "Pirates" was filling the company's coffers with well-earned gold.
utile•00
- lor_
- 23 mai 2016
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