- [first lines]
- Justin Russo: [on phone] Eh, Mom. OK, so you and dad crossed over into New Jersey, right? Then it's official; I'm in charge.
- Justin Russo: Because, what if there was a tidal wave or something?
- Justin Russo: I know, I know, I know. But if there was, then would I be in charge? Yes!
- [he hangs up]
- Justin Russo: Alright, I'm in charge!
- Alex Russo: [Alex hits him with a water balloon] Oh, look, a tidal wave. Now you're in charge.
- Justin Russo: Not funny, Alex; this is my new sweater.
- Alex Russo: Justin, when you wear it every day for a week, it's not new; it just needs a wash.
- Max Russo: [Max hits him with a water balloon] OK. I washed it. You're welcome.
- Alex Russo: I'm not constantly jealous. I just really like you.
- Riley: Well, you have a funny way of showing it.
- Alex Russo: No, I don't; I'm constantly jealous; that's how I show it.
- Justin Russo: You didn't respect me being in charge.
- Alex Russo: Why is that so important to you? What about living, having fun, doing stuff you tell stories about? Like this, this is going to be a great story to tell.
- Justin Russo: The only people you could tell this story to would ground you.
- Alex Russo: If you'd calm down every once in a while, I would tell you stories. Like... I bet you've always wondered what happened to your light-saber and cape.
- [Alex walks away quickly]
- Justin Russo: Alex, how am I supposed to be calm when you tell me stuff like that!
- [last lines]
- Max Russo: Oh, come on, you grandpas! Can't anyone dunk me? You know, it's really hot out here. I could really use a dip.
- [Alex slaps the trigger, dunking him]