The Smoking Room (TV Series)
No Place Like Home (2005)
Fraser Ayres: Clint
Quotes
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Lilian : Oh, God! I've been stuck in the car park for half an hour going precisely nowhere! And there's a documentary on tonight that I do *not* want to miss!
Clint : Men with Breasts?
Lilian : That's the one!
Sally : Have the men got breasts or is it about what men are like when they get their hands on a pair?
Barry : Grateful...
Lilian : No, they've actually got them, it's some weird syndrome... Ooh, nature's cruel! That poor chap on the advert was so good-looking!
Clint : And? He had a really cracking pair of tits!
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Janet : I ran over a dachshund once...
Clint : [shocked] Why?
Janet : It just ran out! I didn't even see it... But I felt the bump... I still wake up at night sweating...
Robin : At least you've been getting *some* sleep...
Janet : It comes to me in nightmares... Its little sausage body, looking for its head...
Clint : You know what you should do, Jan? Put a bowl of Chum out and then its little ghost head will run in, gobble it all up...
Sharon : Janet, you could be on the phone now, working out how I'll get home, instead of treating us to tales of dead dogs!
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Lilian : Do you know? I can't say I'm minding being stuck here now. And, truth be known, I'm still not used to being in an empty house.
Clint : Has someone stolen your furniture?
Lilian : Devoid of people? Pain and all as Greg was, it was nice when I walked into a room and said "what have I come in here for?" to have somebody go "I dunno!"
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Clint : Bet you're missin' out on a mad one, eh, Sharon?
Sharon : A mad what?
Clint : Night out! You earn a good whack! Bet you hit the bars and it's "another bottle of champagne!", yeah? "Another bottle of champagne!", yeah? "Another bottle of champagne!"
Sharon : No!
Clint : Don't you like champagne?
Sharon : Certainly not in those quantities!
Sally : So where do you go if you don't go to the pub? Movies?
Sharon : I can't see the appeal... It's just sitting in the dark, staring forwards...
Lilian : Do you not get lonely at home on your own?
Sharon : I'm not on my own, I've got a cat.
Lilian : Aww, what's its name?
Sharon : Oh, it hasn't got a name! Can't see the point. But I'll sometimes talk to that. Say, "get out!" or "get off the sofa!"