Corner Gas (TV Series)

Happy Campers (2007)

Fred Ewanuick: Hank Yarbo

Quotes 

• Wanda Dollard : Are you saying that you've had a bad hair day every day for 20 years?

  Hank Yarbo : At least. Why do you think I've always got that hat on my head?

  Wanda Dollard : To muffle the voices.

• [Wanda, usually the cashier at Corner Gas, waits on tables at the Ruby Cafe] 

  Wanda Dollard : Lacey and I were arguing over whose job was harder, so we switched.

  Hank Yarbo : You mean like on Gilligan's Island?

  Wanda Dollard : No, not like on Gilligan's Island. They didn't have jobs on Gilligan's Island.

  Hank Yarbo : Well, they did on that episode where the Professor made a bamboo movie camera and Ginger made a movie. An actor's a job. So's a bamboo movie camera maker.

  Wanda Dollard : Aw, Hank, grow up. An actor's not a job.

• Hank Yarbo : Last night I realized that as long as I don't go to bed, my good hair day never ends.

  Lacey Burrows : Oh, well, that's a logical assumption. So you'll just never sleep again?

  Hank Yarbo : Well, it's either that or go back in time, and I'm months away from cracking that nut.

• Hank Yarbo : Look. Every morning I get up and do my hair and it looks bad, so I put on the hat. But not today. Today, my hair looks good.

  Wanda Dollard : Hmm, not bad.

  [beat] 

  Wanda Dollard : Wait. Are you saying that you've had a bad hair day--every day--for 20 years?

  Hank Yarbo : At least. Why do you think I always got that hat on my head?

  Wanda Dollard : To muffle the voices?

• Lacey Burrows : [Hank is asleep standing up]  Hank. Hank!

  Hank Yarbo : [wakes up startled]  Muffins!

  Lacey Burrows : Go home. Get some sleep. Have a bath. Have a series of baths.