Lisa Ruddy: Lisa Ruddy

Quotes 

• Lisa Ruddy : You mean there aren't gonna be any changes? Despite everyone saying that this was a new and improved, extra clean, whiter and whiter show, it's gonna be the same as before?

  Christine McGlade : Well, no, not entirely.

  Lisa Ruddy : Well, what are they gonna do different?

  Christine McGlade : It's gonna coast more and there's gonna be less of it.

• Lisa Ruddy : You know, Christine, all these commercials about food and restaurants and cooking shows are just awful. Every time I see them, I want to get up to the fridge and go get something to eat.

  Christine McGlade : From the looks of it, you must watch a heck of a lot of television.

• Lisa Ruddy : Well, if journalists want a free press, how come I still have to pay 35¢ per newspaper?

• Lisa Ruddy : Did you know that television cameras add fifty pounds to your weight?

  Alasdair Gillis : Really?

  Lisa Ruddy : Well, yeah, so I make sure I don't eat any television cameras.

• Christine McGlade : I have just finalized the plans for a whole new and improved You Can't Do That On Television, and this is my master plan for the new show format.

  Lisa Ruddy : Uh, Christine, this is exactly the same format we've been using all along.

  Christine McGlade : Yeah. So?

  Lisa Ruddy : Well, then it's not "new and improved," is it?

  Christine McGlade : Well, yeah! I did the exact same thing that anyone else does when they "new and improve" a product.

  Lisa Ruddy : Well, what's that?

  Christine McGlade : Well, they just say it's new and improved just to make people think that it is when it's just really the same show all along. Ah, pretty good, ay? But, I've something even better to make people really believe that it's new and improved.

  [Holds up a sign that reads: "Under New Management"]