Ghost in a Teeny Bikini (2006 Video)

Nicole Sheridan: Tabitha the Ghost

Photos 

Quotes 

• Tabitha the Ghost : You may have inherited your share of old Silas's fortune, my dear, but it won't be so easy to get with Archibald Weisenheimer in the picture. He's an evil, evil man who will stop at nothing to get the entire inheritance for his daughter. Still, I've never liked him. And it would be nice to have someone new to haunt for a change. Enjoy your stay at Ravenswood Manor, my dear. I'll be lurking for you.

• Archibald Weisenheimer : Can you hear me, my dear Silas? I'll bet you can't. WELL, HEAR THIS! I wouldn't bet too much on little Muffin Baker! Something tells me she's not going to inherit a dime!

  Tabitha the Ghost : You're rotten to the core, Archie, but I still may be able to foil your evil plans, in the meantime.

  Archibald Weisenheimer : Nice try, Silas, but I don't believe in ghosts!

  Tabitha the Ghost : Neither did Scrooge. See you later, Archie!

  Archibald Weisenheimer : Just you try that again, Silas, and I'll mix you into the kitty litter box! You don't believe me? Just you try it!

• Tabitha the Ghost : Oh, my God. One more lame joke like that, and I'm gonna kill all of you.

• Tabitha the Ghost : When the cat's away, the mice just don't play; they positively party down. Smart ghosts might try to figure out a way to get in on some of that action. Hmm. It's been such a long time. I wonder if anybody up there would care. Thanks! I knew you'd see it my way!

• Muffin Baker : That poor Ted. I guess I could've given him something. What kind of girlfriend am I?

  Tabitha the Ghost : It's not gonna be a pretty sight. But if you don't take care of your man, somebody else will.

• Archibald Weisenheimer : Hmm. Indeed. Very interesting.

  Muffin Baker : What's it say?

  Archibald Weisenheimer : It says... well, let me cut to the chase. In a word, Silas has turned this solemn occasion into a treasure hunt of sorts.

  Evilyn : Excuse me?

  Archibald Weisenheimer : Yes; Silas has hidden a key, somewhere in the estate, that opens a... small treasure box, also hidden somewhere on the estate, which contains within it the deeds to his properties and his big book.

  Marsh : What does it all mean?

  Archibald Weisenheimer : Finders keepers, my dear Marsh. I suggest we all pool our resources and work together. That way, should we find any treasure, we can divide the estate evenly.

  Muffin Baker : I'll think about it and I'll let you know. I don't like people trying to kill me, Mr. Weisenheimer!

  Archibald Weisenheimer : Wait.

  Evilyn : What now, Daddy dearest?

  Archibald Weisenheimer : There's something I didn't tell the others. There's a mention of Muffin in this will. It seems she used to play in this house as a child. And something about that period of time plays into all of this, but I haven't quite figured out yet what it is.

  Evilyn : Well, we'll have to watch her... carefully.

  Tabitha the Ghost : Oh, yeah? Well, I know something you don't know, and I'm not gonna tell you what it is.

• Ted Wood Jr. : Muffin, please, can we talk about this?

  Muffin Baker : No.

  Ted Wood Jr. : You gotta believe me, I was drugged or something! I didn't know what I was doing!

  Muffin Baker : You look like you were doing what you know you were doing, you know?

  Ted Wood Jr. : Well... sort of, but there seems to be an evil plot, trying to pull us apart. I mean, divide and conquer. Lift and separate!

  Muffin Baker : Yeah, I know what you mean. I'm still mad at you!

  Ted Wood Jr. : Will you think about it, please?

  Muffin Baker : Yeah, maybe. But not right now; my mind is just so muddled.

  Ted Wood Jr. : I'm so sad. I'm housebroken.

  [leaves the room] 

  Muffin Baker : What a mess! And now, this hidden key business... how am I supposed to figure that one out? I've never been good with puzzles.

  Tabitha the Ghost : [sits right next to Muffin Baker on her bed]  Why don't you sleep on it?

  Muffin Baker : Maybe I should sleep on it.

  Tabitha the Ghost : A quick nap oughta do.

  Muffin Baker : A quick nap right now sounds really good.

  [lies down on the bed and falls asleep] 

  Tabitha the Ghost : In your waking world, no one can see me. Only in your dreams, could we ever be together.

  [kisses Muffin on her cheek] 

  Tabitha the Ghost : So dream on, my dear... and in your dreams, I'll be with you.

  Muffin Baker : [opens her eyes and sees Tabitha on the bed right next to her]  Oh! Who are you?

  Tabitha the Ghost : Only a dream that's here to provide you with pleasure.

  Muffin Baker : So this isn't real?

  Tabitha the Ghost : It's only a fantasy.

  Muffin Baker : Cool! I've never been with a chick before!

  [Muffin and Tabitha giggle together, and they begin seducing each other with passion]