Sanford and Son (TV Series)

The Camping Trip (1976)

Demond Wilson: Lamont Sanford

Photos 

Quotes 

• Lamont Sanford : Now give me a match so I can start a fire.

  Fred G. Sanford : You don't need no matches to start no fire. All you need to do is rub two pieces of wood together. Now go over there and rub your head upside the tree.

• Fred G. Sanford : Speaking of nature, where's the outhouse?

  Lamont Sanford : Anywhere you want it to be.

  Fred G. Sanford : Well, I want it to be in the bathroom.

• Lamont Sanford : Well, I got good news and I got bad news, Pop. The bad news is the truck won't start.

  Fred G. Sanford : What's the good news?

  Lamont Sanford : We'll always know where it is.

  Fred G. Sanford : Well, don't just stand there. Call the auto club.

  Lamont Sanford : Call the auto club? Pop, we're fifty miles from the nearest phone!

  Fred G. Sanford : Well, don't use the nearest phone, get a closer one! In fact, we don't even need a phone!

  [Cups his hands over his mouth, then yells] 

  Fred G. Sanford : HELLLLP!

  [Stops when he hears his voice echoing] 

• Fred G. Sanford : [after complaining about being "stranded" for nothing, and Lamont apologizing for him being hungry]  Actually, I wasn't all that hungry.

  [Pulls a wrapped hamburger out of his coat pocket and offers it to him] 

  Fred G. Sanford : Want a Superburger?

  Lamont Sanford : [Surprised]  Where did you get that?

  Fred G. Sanford : When you were asleep last night, I snuck over to the diner in town and got it... but... they forgot to put ketchup on it.

  Lamont Sanford : [Pulls one of his own out of his own coat pocket and offers it]  That's alright, here, you can have mine. I don't like ketchup.