Andy Kaufman: Latka Gravas, Vic Ferrari

Quotes 

• Simka Dahblitz-Gravas : You were wonderful, you were charming, and you said your name was Vic.

  Latka Gravas : Vic! Oooh, that - Vic! I am not Vic! I don't even like Vic! Listen, sit down, please! Tell me everything! What did you do with Vic last night?

  Simka Dahblitz-Gravas : You mean, you don't remember?

  Latka Gravas : No.

  Simka Dahblitz-Gravas : [guilty]  Well, I don't know what to say. I can't say that...

  Latka Gravas : I knew it! You made love with Vic!

  Simka Dahblitz-Gravas : Well, I did, but...

  Latka Gravas : You made love with another man right under my nose!

  Simka Dahblitz-Gravas : Well, there *was* no other way! Besides, that was you!

  Latka Gravas : Was I clumsy? Did I whimper?

  Simka Dahblitz-Gravas : No, you were wonderful.

  Latka Gravas : Then it wasn't me!

• Latka Gravas : [as Vic Ferrari]  What died in here? Where am I, Ramada Inn of Romania?

• Latka Gravas : Women don't like timid weak men half as much as they should.

• Simka Dahblitz-Gravas : Baby cakes!

  Latka Gravas : Simka?

  Simka Dahblitz-Gravas : Ohh... Latka cakes?

  Latka Gravas : What's going on here? Why are you still here? What are so happy about?

  Simka Dahblitz-Gravas : You don't remember?

  Latka Gravas : No.

  Simka Dahblitz-Gravas : Well... oh, we had a wonderful time. Oh, you were very funny. And very charming. And you said your name was Vic.

  Latka Gravas : Vic! Ooooh, that guy! I am not Vic. I don't even like Vic. Listen, sit down please. Tell me everything. What did you do with Vic last night?

  Simka Dahblitz-Gravas : Are you sure you want to know?

  Latka Gravas : Yes. Of course, not if you think it will destroy me.

  Simka Dahblitz-Gravas : Well, I don't know what to say.

  Latka Gravas : Well, for instance, you can say that you were up all night with him and you discussed whether the Today Show is better with Bryant Gumbel.

  Simka Dahblitz-Gravas : I cannot say THAT.

  Latka Gravas : I knew it... you made love with Vic.

  Simka Dahblitz-Gravas : Well, I did, but...

  Latka Gravas : You made love with another man right under my nose.

  Simka Dahblitz-Gravas : Well, there was no other way! And besides, that was you.

  Latka Gravas : Did I whimper? Was I clumsy?

  Simka Dahblitz-Gravas : No, you were wonderful.

  Latka Gravas : Then it wasn't me.

  Simka Dahblitz-Gravas : Latka, please...

  Latka Gravas : You have shamed me! Degraded yourself! Disgraced your family! Cheapened your people and blemished your planet!