- Filburt Shellbach: [voicing Mr. Cheese] I am the cheese! I am the best character on this show! I am better than both the salami and the bologna combined!
- Heffer Wolfe: [beats up Filburt] Your drawings aren't even good enough for the Family Channel, Filburt!
- Ralph Bighead: I wanted to pursue my dream. I wanted to sculpt the world's largest still life. And now I'll never get to do it.
- Ralph Bighead: Hey, guys. Just came by to pick up the finished film. I'll give you a couple of minutes to wrap things up, okay?
- [Ten years later, Devil's Sweatgland. Ralph climbs up a hill, throwing the spoon he used onto a large pile of other spoons. His hair is grey. He's grown stubble and a long beard. He's toothless and her clothes are torn. He reaches the top and looks out over the canyon]
- Ralph Bighead: Dear gosh. Let this not be another delusion. Can it be? Can it be that I've finally finished my life's master work?
- [It absolutely can be. On one of the jutting hills is the world's largest still life, carved out of the rock]
- Ralph Bighead: BEHOLD! MY MASTERPIECE IS COMPLETE!
- [He sinks to his knees, buries his face in his hands and sobs]
- Ralph Bighead: I'm so happy.
- [a hillbilly rabbit comes to his side, and tilts his head to one side]
- Hillbilly: Hey, not bad. But have you seen Wacky Delly?
- [the toad's hair stands on end]
- Hillbilly: The first season, that is. Before that guy ruined it.
- Ralph Bighead: [after Bighead Studios is closed, standing on top of the car] YOUUU CRETINS! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT ART IS! I'LL SHOW YOUUUUUUUU!
- Ralph Bighead: Can't you see that I hate this show, and I've been trying to sabotage it since day one? But you keep messing me up! I wanna get out of this business, and make real art!
- Rocko: O-kay! So Betty wakes up and says "Oh, what a beautiful day". And then the telephone...
- Heffer Wolfe: Or doorbell!
- Rocko: Or doorbell ringing, and she answers it and says "Hello?" And then the salami...
- Filburt Turtle: Or cheese!
- Rocko: [getting angry] Or cheese says "I hate bologna" and attacks her through the phone before belching while all the stuff comes out of his mouth while we hold on him for a long time!
- [He struggles to contain his anger]
- Rocko: ... Okey-dokey? So... then... she walks up to the counter, and...
- Heffer Wolfe: HOLD IT!
- Rocko: [furious] WHAT?
- Heffer Wolfe: Hmm... y'know, I was thinkin'...
- Rocko: [at the limits of his patience] YES?
- Heffer Wolfe: [after a long pause] Do we really need the cheese at all?
- Bev Bighead, Ed Bighead, Rocko, Heffer Wolfe, Filburt Turtle: Welcome home, Ralph!
- [Ralph frowns and abruptly slams the door. Bev, worried, opens it]
- Bev Bighead: Something the matter, dear?
- Ralph Bighead: Mom, they forced me to make a new show. I don't wanna make a new show.
- Bev Bighead: [to the others] He doesn't wanna make a new show.
- Ralph Bighead: I wanted to pursue my dream. I wanted to sculpt the world's largest still life. Now I'll never get to do it.
- Rocko: What's your new show going to be about, Mr. Ralph Bighead?
- Ralph Bighead: I have no idea.
- Voiceover: The meatloaf should be spongy, yet firm.
- Rocko: Gee, RB, I think you've got it all wrong. You've been afforded a great opportunity here! Running your very own animation series? And everybody loves it! It's your art! Instead of fleeing from your situation, you should be embracing it! You should be trying to make it the best darn show it can possibly be! You should be the best Ralph Bighead you can be!
- Ralph Bighead: Yeah, Rocko. Yeah, Rocko! Yeah, Rocko! YEAH, ROCKO! I'M GONNA DO IT! I'M GONNA MAKE THIS THE BEST DARN SHOW THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN!