SpongeBob SquarePants (TV Series)

The Chaperone/Employee of the Month (2000)

Rodger Bumpass: Squidward Tentacles

Photos 

Quotes 

• SpongeBob SquarePants : Hey Squidward. Hey Squidward. Hey Squidward. Hey Squidward.

  Squidward : Okay, I'll bite. What is it.

  SpongeBob SquarePants : Do you know what day it is?

  Squidward : Annoy Squidward Day?

  SpongeBob SquarePants : No, silly. That's on the fifteenth.

• Squidward : Okay. Let's have a good, clean fight.

  SpongeBob SquarePants : And may the better man win!

  [They shake hands. We see closeups of their worn, sleepless faces] 

  SpongeBob SquarePants : [in his thoughts]  He's nothin' but a lyin', boneless, ink-squirtin', big-nosed phony!

  Squidward : [in his thoughts]  Look at that buck-toothed, corn-fed smile! You can't trust him as far as you can throw him!

  SpongeBob SquarePants : [in his thoughts]  As soon as he stops shaking my hand...

  Squidward : [in his thoughts]  ... I'm gonna make a run for it!

  [Their hand shaking has gotten stiff and mechanical. The two of them laugh nervously, and then make a run for it] 

• Squidward : I could win Employee of the Month with my tentacles tied!