- David Nelson: I promised to help a couple of friends of mine.
- Ricky Nelson: What about me? I'm your brother, you know.
- David Nelson: Don't get maudlin.
- Ricky Nelson: Oh, yeah? I suppose you think I don't know what that means.
- David Nelson: Okay. What does it mean?
- Ricky Nelson: Just for that, you can look it up yourself.
- David Nelson: I told you, I promised to help a couple of friends of mine. A guy can have a couple of friends in this world, can't he?
- Ricky Nelson: Oh, yeah? If it wasn't for me, you'd be an only child.
- [first lines]
- Ricky Nelson: Whaddaya mean you're not goin', David?
- David Nelson: What does it sound like I mean?
- Ricky Nelson: Sounds like you mean you're not goin'.
- David Nelson: OK, then, what's your question?
- Ricky Nelson: Whaddaya mean you're not goin', David?
- David Nelson: I'm not goin'.
- Ricky Nelson: OK.
- David Nelson: And that's final.
- Ricky Nelson: OK, OK .
- [after a short pause]
- Ricky Nelson: I'll give you one more chance.
- David Nelson: Thanks a lot, but I'm not goin'. I happen to have other obligations.
- Ricky Nelson: Big words!
- [the show begins with an cold-open 'integrated commercial', common in the early days of television]
- Ricky Nelson: David... which hand do you brush your teeth with?
- David Nelson: My right hand, of course. Why?
- Ricky Nelson: Nothing. I usually brush mine with a toothbrush and Listerine Tooth Paste.
- David Nelson: [sarcastically] Oh, what a funny little man you are!
- [opening credits follow]