WKRP in Cincinnati (TV Series)

The Consultant (1981)

Carol Bruce: Lillian Carlson

Quotes 

• Lillian Carlson : [after Andy leaves, Mrs. Carlson tastes her coffee, and is pleasantly surprised]  Why Hirsch, this coffee's delicious!

  Hirsch : Uh-hm. That's because we were having a guest, Madam. When it's just you and me, I prepare it a little differently.

• Lillian Carlson : [to Andy after Breeze has left the room, knowingly about how he sabotaged Breeze]  You are a very, very bad boy.

  Andy Travis : Well, you know, it's kinda hard to get to know people in one day. I remember...

  Lillian Carlson : [interrupting]  THAT'S enough. Hirsch!

  Hirsch : Yes, madam?

  Lillian Carlson : You've been eavesdropping.

  Hirsch : Oh no, madam... very handy, as usual.

  Lillian Carlson : Kindly escort Mr. Travis to the door, and watch him very carefully. Make sure he doesn't steal the doorbell!

  Hirsch : [wearily]  Yes, madam.

  Andy Travis : [as he's leaving]  Gonna need some more money!

  Lillian Carlson : Out.

  Andy Travis : Kind of overspent on the lobby...

  Lillian Carlson : Out!

  Andy Travis : We'll talk later.

  Lillian Carlson : GO!

• Andy Travis : Mrs. Carlson, why don't you just leave it to me. Trust me.

  Lillian Carlson : Oh impossible, Mr. Travis. While I do have a certain amount of confidence in you, I trust no one but my own son, and I always trust him to do the wrong thing. Unless of course the subject is fish - show my son a mackerel and his mind becomes a computer.

• [Hirsch has only been gone a few minutes when he has returned with the requested coffee] 

  Lillian Carlson : [sternly]  Where have you been?

  Hirsch : [laughing under his breath]  Mardi Gras, Madam.

• Lillian Carlson : HIRSCH! One dry vodka martini... stirred, not shaken.

  [beat] 

  Lillian Carlson : Served in a peanut butter glass!

  Hirsch : Yes, your majesty!