- Buck Tuddrussel: What about the time I caught you putting on make up?
- Larry 3000: That isn't as bad as the time you were having a drink and got your head stuck in the toilet.
- [Larry expresses ingratitude towards Buck's efforts to be nice]
- Buck Tuddrussel: That's it! No more Mr. Nice Tuddrussel!
- Larry 3000: [sarcastically] Ooh, I'm so scared.
- Buck Tuddrussel: Well, you should be, Maestro, when I tell everyone what a lousy artist you are.
- Larry 3000: [sarcastically] That reeeally hurts. Especially coming from a man who sleeps with a nightlight and a teddy bear!
- [the audience laughs]
- Buck Tuddrussel: Hey! You leave Mr. Binky out of this!
- [the audience laughs harder]
- Buck Tuddrussel: I checked your Blue Book value, Larry, and it said you were worthless.
- Larry 3000: I tried to check your I.Q., but numbers don't go that low.
- Larry 3000: What happened to the nice Tuddrussel?
- Buck Tuddrussel: [shoving the trophy on Larry's head] He got replaced with the one who's gonna kick your butt!
- Larry 3000: [sullenly sliding a bowl of soup over to Buck] Here's your lunch.
- Buck Tuddrussel: [getting out a politeness phrase book and gazing hard at the text] Uh... Th-ank you, Larry. It is de-li-ci-ous.
- [He gives Larry an awkward smile]
- Larry 3000: Oh, now you're mocking me?
- Buck Tuddrussel: No, no, no, no, no, no, wait, buddy, man, I'm so sorry I hurt your feelings back there, I'm, I'm turnin' over a new leaf. From now on, I'm gonna try and be more, uh...
- [He gets out the book again]
- Buck Tuddrussel: ... Where is it? Oh, here you go. Sen-si-tive.
- Larry 3000: [bursting into derisive laughter] Sensitive? You? You're barely housebroken.
- [the Time Squad learn that Socrates is a fitness instructor]
- Socrates: Let's kick it up a notch, people! Work it!
- Buck Tuddrussel: Okay, pops. The joyride's over. From now on, you're teachin' philosophy.
- Socrates: Over my dead body.
- Buck Tuddrussel: Have it your way.
- [He sticks his truncheon into the wheel of Socrates' cycling machine, sending him flying]