The Simpsons (TV Series)

Stark Raving Dad (1991)

Dan Castellaneta: Homer Simpson, Krusty the Clown, Confused Worker, Grampa Simpson, Barney Gumble, Bill, Mayor Quimby

Photos 

Quotes 

• Homer : Who are you?

  Leon Kompowsky : [in Michael Jackson's voice]  Hi, I'm Michael Jackson from The Jacksons.

  Homer : I'm Homer Simpson, from The Simpsons.

• Leon Kompowsky : We call this one the Chief. He's been here since 1968. Never says a word. Never moves a muscle.

  Homer Simpson : [waves]  Hey, Chief.

  Chief : [waves back]  Hello.

  [all the doctors gather around muttering and writing notes] 

  Chief : Well, it's about time somebody reached out to me!

• [Homer is calling home from a mental institution] 

  Bart : Joe's Taxidermy. You snuff 'em, we stuff 'em.

  Homer : Boy, when I get home, I'm gonna wrap my hands around your neck and...

  [noticing the orderlies glaring at him, he relents] 

  Homer : ...smother you with kisses.

  Bart : Homer, whatever they've got you on, cut the dose.

• Homer Simpson : Who stole my shirt? Who stole my shirt?

  Marge : I washed it.

  Homer Simpson : Oh, thank you Marge.

  [Homer saw his pink shirt from the laundry basket] 

  Homer Simpson : Aaaah! Pink? Marge, I can't wear a pink shirt to work. Everybody wears white shirts. I'm not popular enough to be different.

  Marge : Now Homer don't panic, you have plenty of white shirts.

  Homer Simpson : [Homer grabs all of his pink shirts]  Oh gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme, oh no pink? pink? Pink!

  [Homer sobs] 

  Homer Simpson : It's all over, Marge! It's all over!

  [Homer continues to sob] 

  Marge : [Marge grabs Homer's pink underwear]  I don't know how this could have happened?

  Bart : [Bart grabs his red hat]  Ah, my lucky red hat. Clean as a whistle.

  Homer Simpson : [Homer saw Bart and his red hat from Homer's pink shirts]  You! You did this to me!

  Bart : [Bart getting strangled by Homer]  I... apologize!

  Marge : Oh, please. No one's going to notice if you wear a pink shirt to work.

• Homer : [yells after being shown an inkblot that looks like Bart]  The boy!

• Homer Simpson : [after Leon moonwalks]  How do you do that thing with your feet?

  Leon Kompowsky : You mean the moonwalk?

  Homer Simpson : No! That thing with your feet!

• Homer Simpson : [trying to scrub off hand stamp that reads "insane"]  Come off! I'm sane now!

• Bart : [Homer gives a mental health questionnaire he's supposed to complete to Bart]  Dad, maybe you should fill out this form.

  Homer : Son, it's no different than the time I let you vote for me. Remember that absentee ballot?

  Bart : Oh, yeah!

  [Homer quickly gets absorbed in a "funniest home videos" show on the TV] 

  Bart : Hey, Dad, do you hear voices...?

  Homer : [annoyed]  Yes, I'm hearing one now, while I'm trying to watch TV!

  Bart : [checks]  "Yes." Are you quick to anger...?

  Homer : [angrily and raises his fist]  BART! Shut up or I'll shut you up!

  Bart : [checks]  "Yes." Do you wet your pants...? Well, even the best of us has an occasional accident.

  [he proceeds to check "yes" for all remaining questions] 

• [after Homer handed his mental health questionnaire to Mr. Burns and Smithers] 

  Homer : So did I pass?

  Montgomery Burns : [laughing]  No.

  Homer : [security guards grabbed Homer]  Bart!

  Waylon Smithers : Careful, men. He wets his pants.

• Doctor : After analyzing your husband, we have determined that he's not a danger to anyone.

  Homer Simpson : That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me. Can I have it in writing?

• Dave : Okay so I was working an insurance company right

  [sniffles] 

  Dave : youngest VP in the history of the firm, okay the job was my life

  [sniffles] 

  Dave : then one Monday morning

  [clears throat] 

  Dave : I got up I couldn't leave the house, I just couldn't

  Homer : Was the door locked?

  Dave : No, I just couldn't face what was out there

  Homer : Was it raining?

  Nurse : No Homer, Dave suffers from agoraphobia: a fear of open areas and crowds, please Dave go on

  Dave : Thank you, anyway that day I, I just couldn't make that long drive to work

  Homer : Were you out of gas?

  [the nurse glares angrily at Homer] 

  Homer : [turns toward Dave]  Pfft baby!

• Leon Kompowsky : [In his real voice]  Well, my work is done here.

  Bart : Hey, Michael, what happened to your voice?

  Leon Kompowsky : This is my real voice. My name is Leon Kompowski, and I'm a bricklayer from Paterson, New Jersey. All my life, I was very angry. Until one day, I just

  [In Michael Jackson voice] 

  Leon Kompowsky : talked like this.

  [in his normal voice] 

  Leon Kompowsky : All of a sudden, everyone was smiling at me, and I was only doing good on this earth. So I kept on doing it. To make a tired point, which one of us is truly crazy?

  Homer : Not me, I've got this!

  [shows his certificate showing he is Not Insane] 

• Mayor Quimby : This is the uh most exciting thing to happen to our uh fair town since the Dalai Lama visited in 1952. And so, I hereby declare that Route 401, currently known as the Dalai Lama Expressway, will be henceforth be known as the Michael Jackson Expressway.

• Homer : Lisa, you like homework. Would you fill out this form for me?

  Lisa Simpson : Well, all right - if you listen to the poem I just wrote.

  Homer : D'oh...! Uh, okay.

  Lisa Simpson : "Meditations on Turning Eight," by Lisa Simpson. "I had a cat named Snowball, she died, she died! Mom said she was sleeping, she lied, she lied! Why, oh why is my cat dead? Couldn't that Chrysler hit me instead? I had a hamster named Snuffy, he died!"

  [that's all she wrote, literally] 

  Homer : No deal.