Photos
Quotes
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Lois : So will you come to Hawaii with me Jerry?
Jerry Seinfeld : Maybe I will, Lois. Maybe I will.
[Jerry winks at camera, like in the Superman movie]
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Jerry Seinfeld : [Opening scene, Lois's office] Ready to go Lois?
Lois : You really like to say my name? Don't you?
Jerry Seinfeld : Excuse me Lois. Stand back Lois. Jimmy's in trouble Lois.
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Jerry Seinfeld : I never did. In four years of high school I would never race anyone again. Not even to the end of the block to catch a bus. And so the legend grew. Everyone wanted me to race. They begged me. The track coach called my parents. Pleading. Telling them it was a sin to waste my god given talent. But I answered him in the same way I answered everyone. I chose not to run.
Elaine Marie Benes : So now Duncan is back?
Jerry Seinfeld : He's back. And I knew he would be someday. Man that's some tart cider!
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Lois : So you were the fastest kid in school.
Jerry Seinfeld : Faster than a speeding bullet Lois.
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Jerry Seinfeld : And he's calling all these people from high school to come and watch. I knew this day would come. I can't do it. I can't go through with it. I'm calling it off. I can't let the legend die. It's like a kid finding out there's no Santa Claus.
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Lois : Would you be able to come all the way downtown again in rush hour and pick me up?
Jerry Seinfeld : I'd have to be Superman to do that, Lois.
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George Costanza : I called one of those girls from the personal ads in the Daily Worker.
Jerry Seinfeld : The Daily Worker has personals?
George Costanza : Yeah, and they say that appearance is not important.
Jerry Seinfeld : Yours or hers?
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[first lines]
Jerry Seinfeld : The Christmas tree certainly seems to inspire a love-hate relationship. All that time is spent selecting it and decorating it, and then a week after, it's just thrown somewhere. You see it by the side of the road. Looks like a mob hit. Car slows down, the door opens, and this tree just rolls out. Bo-bum-poom-boom. People snap outta that Christmas spirit like it was a drunken stupor. They just wake up one morning and go, "Oh, my God! There's a tree inside the house. Just throw it anywhere!"
