- Lucy Brawn: I'll take "I'm Just Telling You What I Heard" for $100.
- Debbie Luciano: Okay. Is Rwanda a country, a talk show, or a nightclub in L.A.?
- Lucy Brawn: A nightclub. I know that, 'cause my friend got hit by a cab there and lost her shoe.
- Debbie Luciano: Hm. I'm sorry, that's incorrect, it's a country.
- Lucy Brawn: I'm just telling you what I heard.
- Weekend Update Anchor: Scientists in Japan have invented underwear for men with a special scent that they claim is irresistible to women. Let me tell you something, if you've got a woman's nose in your crotch, you don't need special underwear, okay?
- James Barone: Okay, okay, we're back now. Now, we're back. Alright, Ant'ny, now you were about to tell us what the weather report was like.
- Anthony: What, outside? Oh, it ain't good, James, it's hot as a bastard!
- James Barone: A'ight. A'ight, Ant'ny, how 'bout tomorrow?
- Anthony: Uh, tomorrow's also gonna be hotter than a bastard!
- Angela Toochie: All over the country?
- Anthony: No, no.. See, Angela, see, every part of the country's got what they call their own weather system. Like, up in Canada, it's cold as a bastard! Out in Seattle, it rains like bastard! Down in Texas, it's muggy as a bastard! I gotta go.
- Angela Toochie: Ant'ny, where you going?
- Anthony: I'm done!