- [Paul reveals that Boris was born in New York]
- Paul Merton: You've lost the accent remarkably well.
- Boris Johnson: I was born in New York because I wanted to be near my mother.
- [Paul hands Boris a Chinese Century egg]
- Boris Johnson: Has this been passed by Health and Safety?
- Paul Merton: More times then you'd care to mention.
- [Paul brings out a standard egg, which has started to go off]
- Paul Merton: Shall I break this egg open, then?
- Boris Johnson: What's in there?
- Paul Merton: Well, what do you *thinks* in there?
- [Boris wants Lynda Lee Potter put into Room 101, but Paul is reluctant]
- Boris Johnson: You want to rescue her?
- Paul Merton: Yeah, she's not going in, so, um, she's not going in.
- Boris Johnson: You're a coward. I think you're frightened of her.
- Paul Merton: Well, she's going in, then. In she goes.
- Paul Merton: Not many people do eat backside of chicken, to be honest. Not even in KFC - not even if you get the bargain bucket. Not much of a bargain - it's somewhere to dip your fingers, I suppose.
- [the audience laugh]
- Paul Merton: As if you don't.