- [first lines]
- Simon Templar: [narrating] You'd have thought the reception was for the President of the United States, a movie star, or an astronaut on the eve of man's first attempt to reach Mars.
- Simon Templar: [to cab driver] Wait for me.
- Simon Templar: [narrating] Ordinarily, I'd have been surprised that a relatively obscure scientist, attending a relatively small conference in a relatively disinterested French resort, could create so much excitement. But this was no ordinary occasion and Professor Edmund Bartlett was no ordinary man.
- Professor Edmund Bartlett: Why did they have to ruin good whiskey by putting ice in it? Only thing ice is good for is packing fish.
- Simon Templar: [arriving at a swimming pool surrounded by bikini clad women] It's a convent. You've brought me to a convent!