- Father Mickey Gavin: Oh, so, you feeling a little angry? Huh? You feeling a little hurt? You feeling betrayed? Well, congratulations, you're feeling, and you're feeling because you're sober!
- Tommy's Dad: I'm an old man. So they put me in jail. That could be two weeks for all we know.
- Uncle Teddy: That could be one week.
- Tommy's Dad: Thanks, a**hole.
- Uncle Teddy: Look, you're not doing this, if this goes down, I'm the shooter.
- Tommy's Dad: I had first dibs.
- Tommy Gavin: Did you just say dibs?
- Johnny Gavin: I hope to Christ he doesn't fall off the wagon.
- Uncle Teddy: I wouldn't blame the guy if he drove the wagon right through the liquor store window and drank the entire inventory.
- Maggie: [to Tommy] Hey, is that... is that the Probie and Garrity? This party is like a goddman meat market.