Series 9 Episode 5
Arthur attends a Senior Citizens Neighbourhood Watch meeting. Also present is D. S. Morley. Arthur has been hired to supply security equipment, which turns out to be telescopes. Morley is baffled but everyone else at the meeting seems keen.
At the lock up Arthur wants Ray to move the many boxes of telescopes taking up space, but Ray is late to meet his girlfriend, a nurse called Amanda. Arthur gives Ray a beeper so he can contact him anytime. Ray leaves. He heads to the hospital where Amanda lives and sneaks past the night porter up to her room. She tells him she has to go back to work and will be finished for 5am.
Later, Amanda phones Ray to wake him and he returns to her flat but she falls asleep in a chair. Ray makes an early start at the lock up, emptying many of its contents out and putting them into a skip his friend has loaned him for a few days. Arthur arrives and is annoyed at Ray for throwing away merchandise, but Ray claims it is all rubbish that no one would buy. Arthur attempts to sell the items to a contact, "Second Hand" Cecil.
At the lock up Ray talks to Amanda on the phone. Arthur pages him. Ray drives a van containing the merchandise and meets Arthur and Cecil. Cecil refuses the merchandise. Arthur's next idea is to sell the merchandise to Alexie Nolan, a traveller who operates a fun fair.
D. S. Morley recieves a call from Mrs Mitchell of the Senior Citizens Neighbourhood Watch, asking him to collect the telescopes and pay Arthur. Morley is annoyed.
Arthur and Ray spend time at the fair. Arthur pays for them to go on the ghost ride. He doesn't notice the cashier mixes different currency into his change.
Later, Ray sneaks away from Amanda's room to avoid the night porter. He drives to the lock up just as D. S. Morley and D. C. Field are leaving after collecting the telescopes. Arthur tells Ray they need to deliver the merchandise to Alexie at the fun fair.
At the fair Arthur asks Alexie for payment but Alexie offers him a deal. They go to the fruit machines. Alexie tells Arthur they are devised to pay out jackpots of £50, but only after £400-£500 has been paid into them. Alexie tells Arthur they have a 1000% profit ratio. He offers Arthur any machine he likes, plus £600 for Arthur's merchandise. Arthur agrees. Ray is unhappy and tells Arthur he let Alexie talk him out of their original deal.
Alexie takes Arthur and Ray to where they keep the machines and tells them to take any they like. There are no fruit machines evident, but Arthur finds some hiding in the back, under cover. Ray suspects Alexie didn't want Arthur to find these.
At the Winchester Morley has Field pay Arthur. Morley sees the new fruit machine installed and puts money in to play, then immediately tells Arthur he is under arrest for not having a gaming license. The fruit machine pays out a jackpot. Morley inspects the coins and notes they are Irish coins. Morley insists Arthur gives him £50 for his jackpot win. Dave gives Morley £50 from the till and Morley and Field happily leave.
Arthur sits in his car at traffic lights. A boy starts cleaning his windows so Arthur tips him. The boy tells Arthur he doesn't accept Irish money. Arthur goes to Rays flat and they deduce the Irish money is coming from the fun fair.
Arthur and Ray sneak back to the fair. They open a machine to remove some coins, which are Irish. Arthur tells Ray about £200,000 in coins being stolen in the Dublin Mint Robbery in 1988. Arthur speculates the money is being smuggled through the fun fair and slowly being passed through the fruit machines to not raise suspicion. Ray tells Arthur that Alexie will soon realise Arthur took one of his machines. Arthur tells him they will give the machine to the police.
At the Winchester Dave has removed all the Irish coins from the machine and taken them to the Irish Trust Bank. He returns to the Winchester to find Arthur and Ray waiting for him wanting to know where the fruit machine has gone. Dave tells them Morley has taken it.
Arthur and Ray go to a hotel where a charity event is to be held and Morley is installing the fruit machine. Arthur tells Morley the machine is rigged, but Morley won't let him have the machine.
Arthur plans to win the money back before the police are aware of the Irish coins inside by continuously playing the machine so it keeps paying out jackpots. Meanwhile, the manager of the Irish Trust Bank has been suspicious of the coins Dave brought in and has been tracing their origin before alerting the police. Morley and Field go to the Winchester. Morley wants to know where Arthur got the machine.
Arthur arrives at the hotel wearing a suit and a money belt containing £600 in coins. He starts playing the fruit machine. Ray arrives at the Winchester. Morley and Field are there. Ray tells them Arthur is at the charity event. Morley tells Ray that Arthur is going to be arrested for his involvement with the coins but Ray insists he can prove Arthur's innocence.
Ray sets up another deal with Alexie to buy a machine and reveals Arthur took one previously. Alexie threatns Ray at knife point for Arthur's whereabouts. As Arthur continues to play the machines his behaviour becomes more erratic. Ray calls his beeper, but Arthur throws it on the ground and stomps on it.
Alexie and some men arrive at the hotel. Morley tells Alexie where Arthur is, while several undercover police wait in the hotel lobby. A scuffle breaks out. Alexie's men are arrested. Alexie escapes, Ray chases him. They fight in the bathroom. Ray eventually punches Alexie several times into a toilet stall. Alexie is arrested.
Later, Ray tells Morley that Arthur took a wrong machine by accident and is trying to win back the stolen money contained inside. Ray wants to tell Arthur it is all over but Morley stops him.
Morley and Field happily watch as Arthur continues to play the machine.
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