- Sparkie: Hi, my name is Frances Franklin, but everybody calls me Sparkie. I don't know why. I guess it's cause all my friends say I sparkle and bubble. They say ever since I'm divorced I'm like another person, all sparkling. Thats why they call me Sparkie.
- [Giggles]
- Sparkie: Isn't that crazy?
- Rhoda Morgenstern: Yes.
- Ted Baxter: Mary, I need your advice about something.
- Mary Richards: Yeah, sure, Ted.
- Ted Baxter: Not that it's important, but... Do you think it sounds too risqué for an anchorman to say he sleeps in the raw?
- Mary Richards: Hey, Rhoda, do you know what I'm doing? I am changing my clothes at eight o'clock at night so that I can go to a club where I'm going to lie about being divorced so that I can perhaps in a few months' time end up in Paris speaking Spanish.
- Dr. Walter Udall: [to Mary] Oh, incidentally, your not-paid-for-yet x-rays came back today. You have a cavity. And I'm not going to tell you where.