Married... with Children (TV Series)

Get Outta Dodge (1994)

Dan Tullis Jr.: Officer Dan

Quotes 

• Officer Dan : Someone call the police? We got a call about a shooting.

  Al Bundy : Yes, I did, but I lied. See, I-I need someone to guard the Dodge, and a cop is cheaper than a Doberman.

  Officer Dan : [to criminal, unlocking his cuffs]  Excuse me. I may need both hands to pound this guy into hash. But if you ever take a shot at my partner again, you're going in.

• Al Bundy : But you don't understand! I got a terrible feeling something's gonna happen to my Dodge.

  Officer Dan : Al, how long have I known you? What, seven, eight years? I've arrested you, what, eleven, twelve times? You're a load in my pants, you know that, Al? No one wants your crummy car. No one even believes this house is occupied! Now, either go to bed, or let me blow you away, so I can go to bed!

  [He reaches into his holster, and pulls out a donut] 

  Officer Dan : On second thought, I gotta go. I might have left something at the donut shop.