- Hawkeye and BJ try to stop a chopper pilot from selling souvenirs derived from war materials derived from locals facing danger getting them, and Klinger becomes a pole-sitter in his latest attempt to get a Section Eight.
- Collecting junk is America's favorite past-time; the 8 year old S. Korean boy upon which Hawkeye operates is full of brass because chopper pilot, WO Willie Stratton (and his ilk) hire them to collect scrap metal and brass. Margaret wants her family heirloom returned to her, but Frank refuses to acknowledge she even gave him her father's ruby and gold signet ring. Klinger decides to sit atop the basketball hoop on a power pole in search of Section 8. An Army MP (Brian Dennehy) questions Ferret Face about a priceless S. Korean treasure: an 800 year old celadon vase of the Koryo Dynasty which Corp. Thomas Hinton claims he sold Frank for $27.75. The 8063 CO is promoting tomfoolery: a private did some pole sitting for 94 hours and 18 minutes and has the new record. Potter grumbles about Drake (the CO) who broke the old Camp Grant goldfish record for eating goldfish by eating 23. Potter laughs as he admits he ate 22 and was sick for a week. Then Potter has a light bulb: Klinger is halfway home to a new record that has nothing to do with Section 8. Margaret gets drunk and starts beating up officers: the ultimatum $15 or 15 teeth works well with one of them. Hawkeye and BJ have a more creative solution to take down the other officer.—LA-Lawyer
- Collecting junk is America's favorite past-time; the 8 year old S. Korean boy upon which Hawkeye operates is full of lead because chopper pilot, WO Willie Stratton (Michael Bell) (and his ilk) hire them to collect scrap metal and brass in the minefields. he pays them a pittance ($2 for a bag of materials) for risking their life. Willie sells the collected metal to other GIs for a fat profit. There is a good market for anything related to the war. Willie makes stuff like earrings designed from .45 caliber shells. A necklace made of safety pins from a 100 hand grenades. An aluminum wristband made from metal that came off a MiG. Hawkeye and BJ confront Willie, but he is not prepared to back off at all. The duo gets Potter to speak to the troops not to buy the war souvenirs.
Margaret wants her family heirloom returned to her, but Frank refuses to acknowledge she even gave him her father's ruby and gold signet ring. She gave that ring to Frank as a gift on their first anniversary. Now she wishes to give it to Donald.
Klinger decides to sit atop the basketball hoop on a power pole in search of Section 8. The 8063 CO is promoting tomfoolery: a private did some pole sitting for 94 hours and 18 minutes and has the new record. Potter grumbles about Drake (the CO) who broke the old Camp Grant goldfish record for eating goldfish by eating 23. Potter laughs as he admits he ate 22 (he was the previous record holder) and was sick for a week. Then Potter has a light bulb: Klinger is halfway home to a new record that has nothing to do with Section 8. He asks Klinger to beat the 94 hr pole sitting record. He has a choice of staying up the pole, or coming down and eating 24 goldfish. Klinger decides to go for the pole sitting record. Klinger breaks the record and earns a 3 day pass to Tokyo.
An Army MP (Brian Dennehy) questions Ferret Face about a priceless S. Korean treasure: an 800 year old Celadon vase of the Koryo Dynasty which Corp. Thomas Hinton claims he sold Frank for $27.75. Margaret confides in BJ and Hawkeye that Frank wont return her family ring back to her. Hawkeye and BJ have a more creative solution to take down Frank. Frank tries to ship his "priceless" vase stateside by hiding it inside a plain military parcel. BJ and Hawkeye switch it with a bedpan, while Margaret gets her ring back from Frank's boot-locker. The vase is returned to the Korean authorities via Potter. Margaret finds that Frank had her ring inscribed with "to dear Louise" as a future gift for her. She threatens Frank to give her $15 to fix the ring or 15 teeth as recompense. Franks gets his checkbook.
Margaret gets drunk and starts beating up officers (she hits Willie right in the smackers for not flying out after Potter gave a whole speech not to encourage a market in military and war souvenirs). Willie still wont stop and gives the 8 yr boy's family $50 as compensation. BJ and Hawkeye threaten to ground him by failing his blood test and Willie finally agrees.
Contribute to this page
Suggest an edit or add missing content