M*A*S*H (TV Series)
Divided We Stand (1973)
Wayne Rogers: Capt. 'Trapper John' McIntyre
Photos
Quotes
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Major Margaret Houlihan : [about Hawkeye and Trapper] There isn't a nurse in this camp they haven't tried to molest.
Captain John McIntyre : Except the male ones.
Hawkeye : Speak for yourself.
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Hawkeye : [speaking to Capt. Hildebrand about himself, Trapper, and Frank Burns] We're thinking of going into practice together when we get home. Isn't that right, Trap?
Captain John McIntyre : Yeah. We're going to open our own clinic, the three of us.
Frank Burns : That's right. The three of us war buddies would run the place.
Hawkeye : Frank would park the cars.
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Frank Burns : Well, a shave wouldn't be a bad start. You both look more like bums than doctors.
Captain John McIntyre : Actually, I was, uh, thinking of becoming a bum doctor, but the proctology class was full.
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Captain John McIntyre : Well, we did it again.
Hawkeye : Screwed up in reverse. We'll never get out of here.