- Matt McGuire: Our first guest is Jackson Myers, whose father is the one and only Mike Myers. Very groovy, baby - I bet he's got one million interesting stories, so let's bring him out - Jackson Myers.
- [Jackson shuffles through the door, waves awkwardly at the web-cam, sits. A few green lights pop on the monitor - "BLING! BLING!"]
- Matt McGuire: Is your dad gonna star in another "Austin Powers" sequel?
- Jackson Meyers: Why would he?
- Matt McGuire: Because he's Mike Myers, the actor who plays Austin Powers.
- Jackson Meyers: Uh-uh, he's Mike Myers, the dry-cleaner. They have the same name.
- Lizzie McGuire: She hasn't even spoken to me.
- David 'Gordo' Gordon: Well, Miranda can be a little unreasonable at times.
- Lizzie McGuire: How can you say that, Gordo? She happened to be accused of stealing!
- David 'Gordo' Gordon: Yeah, well, it did kind of hang around to dry.
- Lizzie McGuire: How can you say that, Gordo? Just because I doubted her for one single second. I mean, the lipstick was in her purse.
- David 'Gordo' Gordon: You're right, the... the evidence was there...
- Lizzie McGuire: How can you say that, Gordo? Miranda is my best friend, I should know that she doesn't steal!
- David 'Gordo' Gordon: I... Whose side do you want me to be on? Yours or... yours?
- Miranda Sanchez: I'm surprised you trust me to be your partner!
- Lizzie McGuire: Yeah, well, I'm surprised that you'd partner with a lousy friend!
- Miranda Sanchez: Oh, yeah? Well, a GOOD friend would have stuck up for me!
- Lizzie McGuire: Oh! Well, you're not Little Miss Perfect, okay? You're always bragging about how you sneak into the movies and pretend to be sick during P.E.!
- Miranda Sanchez: Oh, yeah? Well, I don't play sick just to get out of Larry Tudgeman's birthday! Does that make YOU a thief?
- Lizzie McGuire: No! But it doesn't make me a lousy friend either!
- Miranda Sanchez: Yeah? Well, I...
- Mr. Dig: Ladies! I don't wanna hear any talking, I wanna see some action!
- [Lizzie and Miranda start to fight physically]
- David 'Gordo' Gordon: Give it time. I'm sure it'll blow over. I'm sure everything's gonna be cool.
- Miranda Sanchez: [comes in] Mr. Dig? I'd like another partner, please.
- Lizzie McGuire: [to Gordo] You know, for a smart guy, you sure get a lot of stuff wrong.
- David 'Gordo' Gordon: Yeah, well, what are you gonna do.
- Mr. Dig: And uh Ethan Craft uh spotted a cloud he thought looked like a donkey and ran face first into a beehive.