Law & Order (TV Series)

Married with Children (2004)

Jerry Orbach: Detective Lennie Briscoe

Quotes 

• Uniform Officer #1 : White female, late thirties. People that live in the garden apartment found her first thing this morning. Guy's half in the bag.

  Lennie Briscoe : The early bird catches the hangover.

• Ed Green : Brody, what you got for us, man?

  Medical Examiner Brody : Quick drive by, blunt trauma smorgasboard. Broken pelvis, shattered lower extremities, lots of lacerations. Rib cage like a bag full of broken china.

  Lennie Briscoe : Yeah, jumping off a balcony'll do that.

• Ed Green : Hey, Reed, you got anything?

  CSU Technician Jessica Reed : Usable prints? I doubt it. But I did find this lying out here on the terrace.

  Lennie Briscoe : [she hands him an evidence baggie]  Contact lens.

  CSU Technician Jessica Reed : Cutting edge RGP. Rigid Gas Permeable.

  Ed Green : Could have popped out during the struggle.

  CSU Technician Jessica Reed : Don't get your hopes up. It's extremely durable. It could have been lying out here for days, weeks, months.

  Lennie Briscoe : [handing the baggie back]  I know it's hopeless, but get it to the lab anyway.

  CSU Technician Jessica Reed : [sarcastic]  What a novel idea. I was gonna auction it off on eBay.

• Ed Green : What can you tell us about the upper floors? The ones with the balconies?

  Ian Wrightsman : Those are our executive suites.

  Lennie Briscoe : So much for the golden parachute.

• Ian Wrightsman : Lisa Winslow checked in yesterday afternoon around four o'clock. Reception gave her one room key.

  Ed Green : She certainly didn't mess up the room.

  Ian Wrightsman : Concierge said she just used it to freshen up before her speech at the Hoopla International Convention last night.

  Ed Green : Hoopla?

  Ian Wrightsman : Licensees for various pro basketball products and spin-offs. We have some of the top players here; Julius West, Jimmy Neil.

  Ed Green : What she talk about?

  Ian Wrightsman : I gather she was some kind of motivational speaker. Fire up the reps and sell more sneakers, that sort of thing.

  Ed Green : $500 a day dressing room?

  Lennie Briscoe : I guess she could afford it. Unless this purse is some kind of Canal Street knockoff.

  [finding the vic's ID] 

  Lennie Briscoe : Well, she's our high-diver, all right. Lisa Winslow. No wonder she could afford to use the place just to powder her nose. She's a local. Black Stone Avenue, the Bronx.

  Ed Green : That's Riverdale. Trust me, this purse is real.

• Anita Van Buren : I have a problem.

  Lennie Briscoe : [sardonic laugh]  Join the club. Shawn Beatty's alibi just got corroborated.

  Anita Van Buren : Lisa Winslow's parents are on their way here from New Hope. They want to know why they had to find out about their daughter's death from a news item on the radio.

  Ed Green : We told the sister. She didn't tell the family?

  Anita Van Buren : According to the parents, Lisa Winslow doesn't have a sister.

  Ed Green : What?

  Lennie Briscoe : Then who was the woman we met at Winslow's house?

  Anita Van Buren : We sent a patrol car by to have a word with her. Whoever she is, she's gone and she took the girl with her.

  Ed Green : Damn.