- Ethel Mertz: [while everyone else is asleep, Lucy drives in a circle back to the run-down motel they earlier had decided to leave] Oh, we're not back in the same place!
- Lucy Ricardo: We are, unless there's a chain of these across the country.
- Fred Mertz: Oh, no.
- Ethel Mertz: Lucy!
- Lucy Ricardo: Well, I was only trying to help. I saw a sign that said, 'Good accomodations, good food', and an arrow saying 'Take this road', and somehow I wound up back here.
- Ricky Ricardo: Well, as long as we're here, we're in no condition to continue. We'll stay right here.
- Ethel Mertz: Here?
- Fred Mertz: In Lower Slobovia?
- George Skinner: What'll it be?
- Lucy Ricardo: Well, I think I'll have the steak sandwich, rare, with a french fries.
- Ethel Mertz: Uh, steak sandwich, I'll have that too.
- Fred Mertz: I'll have the same.
- Ricky Ricardo: Me too.
- George Skinner: We're all out of steak sandwiches.
- Lucy Ricardo: Oh, you are?
- Ethel Mertz: Gee, I had a mouth all set for one.
- Lucy Ricardo: Yeah. Well, I think I'll have the... roast beef, rare, with a baked potato, then.
- Ethel Mertz: Roast beef, that's for me.
- Fred Mertz: I'll vote for that.
- Ricky Ricardo: Make it four.
- George Skinner: We're out of roast beef too.
- Ricky Ricardo: [looking at the menu] Well let me see here... hey! That fried chicken with biscuit sounds good.
- Lucy Ricardo: [to George] Any point in running that chicken around the table?
- George Skinner: All out.
- Lucy Ricardo: Well look, we're going at this thing all wrong. Why don't you just tell us what you have, and then we'll order.
- George Skinner: All-righty. How about the specialty of the house?
- Lucy Ricardo: What's that?
- George Skinner: A cheese sandwich.
- Ethel Mertz: A cheese sandwich? Is that all you've got?
- Fred Mertz: I don't feel like a cheese sandwich!
- George Skinner: Well now, come on folks, I can't wait around all night. What would you like?
- Lucy Ricardo: The name of the nearest good restaurant.
- Lucy Ricardo: [after the Mertzes offer to trade beds with the Ricardos, Ethel goes through an elaborate, exhaustive preparation process to make the mattress usable; this includes stuffing pillows and other objects behind Fred in the trench the mattress makes, and tying Fred's nightshirt to the bed-frame to keep him in place] You do that EVERY NIGHT?
- Ethel Mertz: [Disgusted] Yeah... but it took years of practice.