Green Acres (TV Series)
Jealousy, English Style (1967)
Pat Buttram: Mr. Haney
Quotes
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Oliver Wendell Douglas : Well, Mr. Haney.
Mr. Haney : I just stopped by to congratulate you. Is it a boy or a girl?
Oliver Wendell Douglas : A boy or a girl?
Mr. Haney : Oh, you don't know yet. Well, it don't matter. The little tyke will soon sleep happily in this magnificent cradle.
Oliver Wendell Douglas : What the...?
Mr. Haney : It was originally slept in by Benjamin Franklin, in his earlier years, of course.
Oliver Wendell Douglas : What are you talking about?
Mr. Haney : The infant that Mrs. Douglas presented you with.
Oliver Wendell Douglas : What makes you think that Mrs...
Mr. Haney : Everybody in the valley heard her hollering for you to boil hot water last night.
Oliver Wendell Douglas : How could they have heard that?
Mr. Haney : Whenever the wind blows in just the right direction, you can hear everything that goes on here.
Oliver Wendell Douglas : Mr. Haney, no matter what you think...
Tony Ashley : Mr. Douglas, I just fed Eleanor.
Mr. Haney : Oh, Eleanor! Then it's a girl.
Oliver Wendell Douglas : Eleanor is the cow's name.
Mr. Haney : And you named the baby after her. How touching.
Oliver Wendell Douglas : Mr. Haney, my wife did not have a baby.
Mr. Haney : Then why did you hire this English nanny?