Drake & Josh (TV Series)
Dr. Phyllis Show (2006)
Josh Peck: Josh Nichols
Photos
Quotes
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Josh Nichols : [in a flashback]
[to Drake]
Josh Nichols : I hope you go bald!
Drake Parker : [to Josh] I hope they cancel Oprah!
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Dr. Phyllis : [to Drake] Do you ever take advantage of Josh just a little bit?
Drake Parker : Well...
Josh Nichols : But not just me! He takes advantage of everyone!
Drake Parker : Oh, name one time.
Josh Nichols : Okay, uh... that girl, Liza.
Drake Parker : Hot Liza?
Josh Nichols : Yeah. You totally dated her just to get your old girlfriend back.
Drake Parker : Oh, that's an exasperation.
Josh Nichols : EXAGGERATION! Read a book, would ya?
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Dr. Phyllis : Well, clearly there is a lot of fighting that goes on between you two brothers.
Drake Parker : Oh, yeah - and he's always startin' it.
Josh Nichols : Beg to differ.
Dr. Phyllis : Uh, Josh, Drake is speaking right now and you need to respect that, because if you don 't respect him, how will he ever respect you?
Drake Parker : Yes, Josh, how?
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Josh Nichols : Yeah, I'll tell ya a little secret about Drake.
Drake Parker : He can be the most irritating human on the planet.
Josh Nichols : Sometimes he aggravates me to a point where I just wanna go VRRRR-YEOWWW!
Drake Parker : I'm not doin' too good in English, right?
Josh Nichols : You know Drake hates my girlfriend Mindy, right?
Drake Parker : So, last week he goes up to our teacher...
Josh Nichols : So on Saturday, Mindy's walkin' up our driveway...
Drake Parker : ...and Josh tells her I should have a tutor.
Josh Nichols : ...and Drake sprays her with the hose!
Drake Parker : A tutor?
Josh Nichols : A hose!
Drake Parker : I-I-I can't take a shower without finding his hair on the soap.
Josh Nichols : He pees... NEAR the toilet.
Josh Nichols , Drake Parker : [in unison] Sometimes... he just drives me insane!
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[the boys toast their brotherly relationship]
Drake Parker : Ugh! This is diet. Here, switch with me.
Josh Nichols : No, you already took a sip.
Drake Parker : So?
Josh Nichols : So, I don't wanna drink your backwash.
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Megan Parker : [malevolently] It is 11:45 PM. I am a little girl. Little girls are supposed to be asleep at 11:45 PM. Now this is the third night in a row you clowns have kept me up with your fighting.
[the boys resume arguing loudly]
Megan Parker : HEEEEEEEEEEEY!
[the boys fall silent]
Megan Parker : Here.
Josh Nichols : What are these?
Megan Parker : Tickets to The Dr. Phyllis Show. You guys both go on tomorrow after school. The topic is bickering brothers. Now, I'm gonna go back to sleep and I don't wanna hear another sound out of this room.