Daria (TV Series)

The Misery Chick (1997)

Marc Thompson: Mr. Timothy O'Neill, Kevin Thompson

Quotes 

• Mr. O'Neill : "It is better to have loved and lost, then never to have loved at all." Just what is Lord Tennyson talking about? Brittany?

  Brittany : Um, love?

  Mr. O'Neill : Anyone else? Daria?

  Daria : Well, he's acknowledging that if something makes you feel good, like being in love, there must be a corresponding painful side, like losing a love, and that it's just a fact of life.

  Mr. O'Neill : Sad, but true.

  Daria : And what's intriguing about it is that no one calls Tennyson a big unhappiness freak just because he understands that.

  Mr. O'Neill : Is he a big unhappiness freak?

  Daria : No, he's a realist. He says, "Emotional involvement brings pleasure and extraordinary pain." Then he declares that it's better than feeling nothing at all.

  Mr. O'Neill : That is excellent, Daria.

  Daria : Of course, this was before the advent of community property laws.

• [after meeting Tommy Sherman] 

  Jane : I don't think he likes you.

  Daria : That doesn't bother me. What bothers me is that jerk is going to be treated like a hero for the rest of this life.

  Jane : Well, maybe he won't live that long.

  Daria : Come on. You know wishes don't come true.

  [a crash is heard off screen] 

  Kevin Thompson : [Off screen]  Oh, my God! The goal post fell! Tommy Sherman's dead!

  [Sobbing] 

  Kevin Thompson : He's dead!

• Mr. O'Neill : You probably think about the dark side all the time.

  Daria : The... dark side? Are we talking about "The Force"?

• Kevin Thompson : Tommy Sherman.

  Tommy Sherman : That's the name, don't wear it out.

  Kevin Thompson : I'm your biggest fan.

  Tommy Sherman : I doubt that, unless the rest of them are pygmies, ha ha.

  Kevin Thompson : I'm Kevin Thompson, this is Michael Jordan MacKenzie, we call him Mac

  Tommy Sherman : MICHAEL JORDAN MACKENZIE! You're kidding, right.

  Michael Jordan 'Mack' Mackenzie : It was Michael James MacKenzie. My dad went a Bulls playoff game when I was 12, and... then he changed it.

  Tommy Sherman : That's sick man, so what you guys, on the intermural squad, or something?

  Kevin Thompson : Varsity dude, I'm the QB.

  [Tommy Sherman laughs pompously, then Kevin laughs too, unaware of what is so funny] 

  Tommy Sherman : [annoyed]  Why are you laugh?

  Kevin Thompson : Um, why are you?

  Tommy Sherman : I'm just picturing a scrawny little guy like you, trying to play for some third-rate junior college somewhere, and getting your butt kicked every week.

  Kevin Thompson : Oh yeah, that's funny.

  Michael Jordan 'Mack' Mackenzie : No it isn't.