Clueless (TV Series)

Driving Me Crazy (1996)

Stacey Dash: Dionne 'Dee' Davenport

Photos 

Quotes 

• Cher Horowitz : [raising her hand]  Uh, Mr. Dunny, could we maybe postpone this whole driving thing, like... till we're thirty?

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Hello, Mr. Dunny... you really should just excuse me from this, because I don't need it. Murray or his replacement will be driving me everywhere, so...

  Sean Holiday : [grinning]  Unless you get replaced first.

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : [jeering at him]  If!

• Cher Horowitz : Maybe this driving thing isn't as easy as it looks.

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : I never thought it looked easy.

  Cher Horowitz : By the way, did you notice that Queenie was noticably absent today?

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Absolutely chicken.

  Cher Horowitz : So obviously tipped off about the film festival.

  Amber Mariens : [arriving]  Oh, did I miss Wheels of Tragedy? Sorry I was late, I had a little appointment at the DMV... where I picked up... this!

  [laughingly showing off driver's license] 

  Amber Mariens : It goes perfectly with the new car Daddy bought me.

  Cher Horowitz : [surprised]  You got your license?

  Amber Mariens : Yes, so I'm sorry, I won't be able to join you in your little

  [patronizing gesture] 

  Amber Mariens : film society.

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : How did you do this? You just turned sixteen last week.

  Amber Mariens : Practice. Daddy's been letting me drive since I was twelve.

  Cher Horowitz : Isn't that illegal?

  Amber Mariens : [scoffs]  We just drive on our own property. I mean, who's going to arrest us, the landscaper?

  [laughs] 

  Amber Mariens : Oh, well, now the freeway is my oyster. And while you pedestrians are scrambling around trying to find a ride, I will be driving

  [crows with joy] 

  Amber Mariens : to all the parties, and handsome men will snap to my command. Oh, I can't wait to use valet!

  [giggles merrily, goes off] 

  Amber Mariens : Fun!

  Jasmine : This should be new for her, sitting in the front seat.

  Cher Horowitz : You know, guys, this puts us under serious pressure.

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Ah, please, if she can do this. we can do it. All we have to do, is practice.

  [they all go off, Cher follows with a sigh] 

• Dionne "Dee" Davenport : [Cher cross-legged on the floor, Dee kneeling, trying to illustrate road safety to Cher using designer shoes]  Okay. Before the Gucci can make a left turn, it has to wait for the Anna Sui and the Charles Davis to clear.

  [deftly demonstrating as if the shoes were cars] 

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : See?

  Cher Horowitz : [utterly dismayed]  Dee, I destroyed public property. And I dented Daddy's car.

  [grabs a pillow from couch, hugging it] 

  Cher Horowitz : I was a menace. And... and he just kept on yelling at me, "Never again! Never again!"

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : [shaking her head]  Well, I guess not, Cher, but you know, it's really hard, they put those signs in weird places, and you were probably just concentrating too hard on the system.

  Cher Horowitz : The system?

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Didn't your Dad teach you the system?

  Cher Horowitz : No.

  [causing Dee to have a flashback] 

• Murray : [learner driver Dee's 'the system' flashback, as Murray, in the red BMW convertible, counts off on his fingers]  Rear view, side view, glance, signal, scan.

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : [chic green outfit]  I'm comprehending.

  [Murray gives thumb up, she checks rear-view mirror] 

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Side view,

  [checks side-view mirror] 

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : rear view,

  [she glances back] 

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : signal,

  [indicator lights] 

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : scan.

  [she checks, then winks at him, and car pulls away... halting at stop sign a little while later] 

  Murray : Okay, let's make a left-hand turn now.

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Okay.

  [barges forward causing intersection traffic to honk] 

  Murray : Whoa! You can't go now!

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : I signaled, I glanced!

  Murray : No, but you didn't glance at the cars coming directly at you!

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Other cars weren't mentioned in the system.

  Murray : [wry smile]  You're right, you're right, you're right. Other cars weren't mentioned in the system. Okay, check this out.

  [calmly:] 

  Murray : Until those cars have gone,

  [yelling:] 

  Murray : you don't go!

  [scoffs] 

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Fine. That's all you had to say. I'm not gonna go.

  Murray : Okay.

  [cars, with their way blocked, honk behind them] 

  irate fellow-driver : [voice only]  Hey, let's move it!

  Murray : Okay, go!

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Rear view, side view...

  Murray : [yelling]  What are you doing?

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : The system!

  Murray : Forget the system! Just go! Go!

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Okay.

  [about to accelerate away] 

  Murray : No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! There's a lady crossing with a baby carriage. Don't go yet!

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : [gives up on this there and then]  No, it's all so random! Okay, Murray, I'm sorry.

  Murray : [had it's fill of it, too]  You know what? Put the car in park, all right?

  [taking off seat-belt, climbing out] 

  Murray : I say I'm driving home.

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : No...!

  Murray : Yeah, that's it!

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : No...!

  Murray : [thoroughly exasperated]  Never, ever, ever, ever again!

• Dionne "Dee" Davenport : You don't want me to drive, because you wanna control me. You wanna know where I'm at, at all times.

  Murray : [coming round the front of the car]  Listen, I don't care if you get your license, all right, I want you to drive. I just don't want you to drive when I'm in the vicinity, all right? Now get out of the car!

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : No, I have the license. And it's not all about you, Murray!

  Murray : Get out of the car, Dee!

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : No!

  Murray : Go!

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : [her flashback over, back to the present, talking to Cher]  And then he totally scuds me!

  Cher Horowitz : Majorly unsupportive. I am way offended for you.

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Thanks.

• Josh : [Cher scoffs as he enters]  Hey, Cher, I hear you're bringing your redecorating skills to the city property now.

  Cher Horowitz : [gets up, wounded tone]  I'm glad you find my vehicular shortcomings so amusing.

  Josh : Aw, look, Cher, come on, everybody has something like that when they first start out. You know, I never told anybody, but the first time Mel took me out...

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Is that the time you bumped topiary incident? I think I heard about that.

  Cher Horowitz : [to Josh]  Well, Mel was ranting about it for days after you left for your Mom's.

  Josh : [sighs]  The point is, why don't I take you out for a couple of lessons, you know? I know Mel could be a hothead.

  Cher Horowitz : [sighs]  Josh, that's way Mother Teresa of you... but I'm not getting behind a wheel. I'm a complete driving doofus.

  Josh : [sighs]  Well, I'm... I'm here if you need me. Just let me know.

  [gets up, leaves] 

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Observation.

  [gets up] 

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Maybe the stepbrother is right. I mean, it's probably our respective instructors. I bet, if we went and took our tests, we would so fully be in the passing lane.

  Cher Horowitz : [scoffs uncertainly]  Maybe you.

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : No, both of us. I know. If we went down tomorrow and took our tests, we would so fully pass.

• Mr. Dunny : [at stop sign]  Okay, now we are just going to sit here and wait patiently for these cars to clear.

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Which cars? Oh, I hate this! This whole intersection thing is lame!

  Jasmine : [leaning over from back seat]  Okay. Dee, first of all, calm down. Okay?

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Okay.

  Jasmine : Right. Do you see the cars there on your left-hand side?

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Yeah.

  Jasmine : What you're gonna do, is you're gonna wait for them to clear...

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Mm.

  Jasmine : ...and then you're gonna show 'em your business, babe. Just go on ahead.

  [Dee waits, the cars clear] 

  Jasmine : Okay. Okay, go!

  [Dee's well-heeled foot hits the gas pedal, and the car pulls away, executing a perfect turn] 

• Mr. Dunny : [waiting for learner driver to pull away]  Okay, Cher, the coast is clear, let's go!

  [no response] 

  Mr. Dunny : Cher?

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Come on, Cher, you are fully capable.

  [as Cher stammers an excuse, reminding her:] 

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : I did it.

  Jasmine : Cher, are you feeling a little un-confident?

  Mel Horowitz : [his angry face in Cher's mind]  Never again, Cher, never again!

  Cher Horowitz : [defeated look]  I, uhm... I'm feeling kinda car-sick. I don't think I can drive... today. I can't drive today.

  [gets out of the car] 

• Murray : [in class, handing her Jasmine's driver's license]  Cher, check it out.

  Cher Horowitz : [sadly envious]  That's a very flattering photo, Jasmine.

  Jasmine : Thanks.

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : [entering, showing off her license card]  I came, I saw,

  [with a jubilant jump:] 

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : I am driving!

• Dionne "Dee" Davenport : Cher,

  [holds up license card] 

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : look.

  Cher Horowitz : [sadly envious]  That's a very flattering photo.

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : [giggles, then turns to Murray]  Hey, I need to borrow your car Saturday afternoon.

  Murray : [shaking his head]  Sorry, sweetie, you're not on the insurance.

  Dionne "Dee" Davenport : [nudges him]  Yet.

  [winks]