- Kris Munroe: I worked in a massage parlor.
- Lily: Oh, yeah?
- Kris Munroe: It was a real massage parlor. I'm a terrific masseuse.
- Matron Wallace: Come on, this way.
- Kris Munroe: What?
- Matron Wallace: Skin search, in here. Come on!
- Kris Munroe: Oh, not again! Come on, I just came from County.
- Lily: Sorry, it's part of the processing.
- Matron Wallace: Come on. Start chucking, down to the pink. Just pretend I'm your mamma.
- Kris Munroe: How long are you in for?
- Lonnie: One more big one. Listen to this: I stopped my brother in law from taking a tire iron to my sister. They're back together now, I'm in here.
- Coley: What's the rush? I got enough grease slapped on me to lubricate a diesel.
- Matron Wallace: Oh that's no problem, just a blow your horn and slide back to your cell.
- Big Aggie: Hey Lonnie, Crazy Lonnie? This ain't your trouble. You come on out. All we want is the chicken...