- Xander Harris: I still don't get why we had to come here to get info about a killer snot monster.
- Rupert Giles: Because it's a killer snot monster from outer space.
- [pause]
- Rupert Giles: I did not say that.
- [Riley is about to touch the meteorite]
- Anya: Is it hot? 'Cause, uh, if there's radiation you could, like, go all sterile.
- [Riley recoils and Xander scampers away to be behind Anya]
- Riley Finn: No, it's not hot. It's warm. And broken... And sort of...
- Rupert Giles: Hollow.
- Riley Finn: Yeah.
- Anya: So, uh, we're all thinking the same thing, right?
- Xander Harris: Festive piñata? Delicious candy?
- Willow Rosenberg: Something evil crashed to earth in this and then broke out and slithered away to do badness.
- Rupert Giles: In all fairness, I don't think we know about the slithered part.
- Anya: Oh no. I'm sure it frisked about like a fluffy lamb.
- Joyce Summers: I bet it's not even hooked up to anything. Just like the push-buttons at the crosswalk that are supposed to make the signal change.
- Buffy Summers: I'm sure someone's on- Wait. The push-buttons aren't hooked up to anything?
- Buffy: You got her a book on spells? The girl who can break things by just looking at them, now has a book to teach her to break things by looking at 'em?
- [visiting Joyce Summers in the hospital, Dawn helps herself to the Jell-O on Joyce's tray]
- Dawn Summers: It's good and wiggly. This girl at school told me that gelatin is made from ground-up cow's feet, and that if you eat Jell-O, there's some cows that are limping with no feet. But I told her I'm sure they're killed before they take off their feet... Right?
- Buffy: [to Joyce] You're the one who insisted on teaching her to talk.
- [Riley is scraping out slime out of someone's mouth with a pen and everyone recoils from the smell]
- Riley Finn: Ugh. That might be toxic. Don't touch it.
- Xander Harris: Oh yeah. Touching it was my first impulse. Luckily, I've moved on to my second, which involves dry heaving and running like hell. Oh man, does that smell.
- Willow Rosenberg: Care package! Special delivery for the Summers girls. Now, let's see what I have in this sack of mine. I feel just like Santa Claus, except thinner and younger, and female and, well, Jewish.
- [checking the person on the ground]
- Riley Finn: No pulse.
- Anya: [to Giles] Yup. The space lamb got him.
- [first lines]
- [Buffy and Dawn with Joyce in the hospital]
- Joyce Summers: Listen, you two, I know this cream spinach is pretty delicious but I promise I won't be offended if you go out for some real food.
- Buffy Summers: Are you kidding me? This is the good life, relaxing in bed while people bring you food on trays.
- Willow Rosenberg: Oh, Buffy, I have this for you.
- Buffy Summers: Homework...? I don't believe in tiny Jewish Santa anymore.
- Willow Rosenberg: And a yo-yo.
- Buffy Summers: Thank you.
- Riley Finn: Sorry about last time. Heard I missed out on some fun.
- Xander Harris: Oh, yeah. Fun was had. Also frolic, merriment, and near-death hijinks.
- [last lines]
- Joyce Summers: No. Listen to me. No matter what she is, she still *feels* like my daughter... I have to know that you'll take care of her, that you'll keep her safe, that you'll love her like I love you...
- Buffy Summers: I promise.
- Joyce Summers: Good... Good... Oh...
- [hugs Buffy]
- Joyce Summers: My sweet, brave Buffy. What would I do without you?
- Willow Rosenberg: You know what's weird?
- Tara Maclay: Japanese commercials are weird.
- Willow Rosenberg: Yes. And also, you know, some of the stars we're looking at... don't even exist anymore. In the time that it takes for their light to reach us, they've died, exploded. Poof.
- Tara Maclay: Were, um... were things rough at the hospital?