The Andy Griffith Show (TV Series)

The Education of Ernest T. Bass (1964)

Don Knotts: Barney Fife

Photos 

Quotes 

• Sheriff Andy Taylor : I just don't know what to do. I can't put him in jail, he keeps breakin' out. I can't make him understand he's got to leave Helen alone. I don't know what to do with him.

  Deputy Barney Fife : Well, you won't listen to me - you won't listen to your old dad. All I have to do is give him a couple of karate chops, flip him into a corner, and he'd get up and head back for the mountains, never to be seen again.

  Sheriff Andy Taylor : He'd kill you.

  [Barney looking annoyed] 

  Sheriff Andy Taylor : Well, the easiest way is to satisfy him - he wants an education, we'll give him an education. We'll fix him up with a diploma and everything.

  Deputy Barney Fife : I still say, five minutes behind the barn!

  Helen Crump : He'd kill you.

• Deputy Barney Fife : I still say a good battering around is what he'd respond to!

  [Ernest T] 

  Sheriff Andy Taylor : He'd kill you.

• Deputy Barney Fife : I'd give him a few karate chops, and it'd all be over!

  Sheriff Andy Taylor : He'd kill you.

• Deputy Barney Fife : Just give me five minutes behind the barn with him!

  Helen Crump : He'd kill you.