The Addams Family (TV Series)

The Addams Policy (1966)

Eddie Quillan: Mr. Digby

Photos 

Quotes 

• Mr. Digby : Oh, it must have been a dream, I thought I was in the electric chair.

  Morticia Addams : The chair isn't electric, but Uncle Fester is.

  Uncle Fester : Yeah, I'm really hot today!

• Gomez Addams : Well, speak up, old man, you have our bear, haven't you?

  Mr. Digby : Well yes, and no.

  Morticia Addams : I like a man who comes right to the point.

  Mr. Digby : Mr. Addams, we simply can't find a bear that big.

  Gomez Addams : That's absurd, there are thousands of them running all over Alaska!

• Mr. Joe Digby : [looking at a pile of ashes]  I don't want to quibble but how do I know that was a bear?

  Morticia Addams : Well, let's use simple logic. Does it look like an antelope?

  Mr. Joe Digby : No.

  Morticia Addams : A zebra?

  Mr. Joe Digby : No.

  Morticia Addams : A giraffe?

  Mr. Joe Digby : No.

  [later] 

  Morticia Addams : An elephant?

  Mr. Joe Digby : No.

  Morticia Addams : A tiger?

  [much later] 

  Mr. Joe Digby : No.

  Morticia Addams : A camel?

  Mr. Joe Digby : No.

  Morticia Addams : A gorilla?

  Mr. Joe Digby : Well, uh... No! No!

  Morticia Addams : Well, then it must be a bear.

  Gomez Addams : Querida, with your incisive mind you should be on the supreme court.

  Morticia Addams : [considering it]  I do love those black robes.

• Gomez Addams : We don't want money. What we want is another bear.

  Morticia Addams : What else could possibly go with our decor?

  Mr. Joe Digby : The bear may be a little hard to come by. How about a lion?

  Morticia Addams : We already have one.

  Mr. Joe Digby : Stuffed?

  Morticia Addams : Well, he is after he's had his dinner.