- Announcer: It's only human to want to be sexed up every now and again, but if it's the guys in Color Me Badd who are doing the job, well most people would probably rather sex themselves up. A lame slow jam sung by four guys who look like wedding deejays and sound like a castrated barber shop quartet, I Wanna Sex You Up is the #36 most awesomely bad song ever. Congrats guys.
- Rob Tannenbaum: The first 7,000 times you hear Butterfly you think "God that's an awful song." And then you start to pay attention to the lyrics and you realize it's not an awful song, it's a fucking atrocious song. These may be, word for word, the worst lyrics ever written.
- Andy Pemberton: [about the song "I Would Do Anything For Love" by Meat Loaf] The problem with this song, I think, is it makes no fucking sense whatsoever.
- Phillip Bloch: [about R. Kelly's "You Remind Me Of Something"] You're like my sound, I wanna pump ya. You're like my car, I wanna wax ya. What girl wouldn't want to go out with this guy he's obviously such a sweetheart?
- Jim Florentine: [about Nelly's song "Pimp Juice"] Not only is that a bad song but he actually put an energy drink out called Pimp Juice. I drank that stuff actually one night and after that I wrote a bad song.
- Andy Pemberton: [about "Thong Song"] When they mention "dumps like a truck," I have no idea what that means.
- Lombardo Boyar: [thoughtfully] Dumps... like a truck. Maybe he's talking about a girl taking care of business in the bathroom.
- [about "What's Up" by 4 Non Blondes]
- Rob Tannenbaum: What's Up really just sounds like a grunge song, but with something new to it, and that new thing is yodeling. Why did you do that and how can I get you to stop?
- Simmy Kay: Everyone was so sick of that song. And it wasn't even a good song that got old, it was a bad song that got worse. And when that happens, it's a musical tragedy.
- [about Jennifer Lopez]
- Jim Florentine: I was in the Bronx a few weeks ago and I didn't see her. I was looking for her. I did see a woman with a big fat ass, but it wasn't her.
- Lombardo Boyar: [about "Thong Song"] When it first came out, it was cool for about a week. After that, it was just everywhere. Enough with the thong!