- Jan: Anomen, my friend, I realise I've been less than polite with you in the past and I wish to apologize.
- Anomen: Verily, you have played me most false.
- Jan: Indeed! All know you're an unrepentant ass. 'Tis not my place to say so.
- Anomen: Shut up, gnome.
- Jan: Your ugliness, both in body and soul, thought true, is inappropriate for discussion and rankly impolite. You're stupid, poorly educated, and always smell faintly of lilacs, but it was wrong of me to bring attention to it.
- Anomen: Silence before I CRACK YOUR SKULL!
- Jan: Arrogant, drunken, priggish, whiny, pompous are common adjectives used to describe you, but I was wrong to say so. You are completely incapable of independent thought and soil yourself with regularity seldom found outside the nursery. I shall no longer bring these things up in front of the others.
- Lilarcor: What's my status? Since when do you care about me unless I'm impaled in something's guts? Oh well, fine, let me think for a minute... Well, as a matter of fact I would like to register a complaint. I want to kill a dragon. Right now. Go find one and kill it. That would be SO cool.
- Jan: Are you interested in purchasing a bit of merchandise, my friend?
- Protagonist: Why not? What merchandise do you carry, good gnome?
- Jan: Well, you've got the look of an adventurer about you. I've been one myself, betwixt stints as a turnip salesman that is. Occasionally the markets get down and the formerly self-respecting purveyors of fine veggies are forced to prostitute their abilities in the form of adventuring.
- Protagonist: Yes, of course. Mobile vegetable peddling versus heroism, the eternal question.
- Keldorn: Imoen! What... are you pawing at me yet again? Do you think I do not notice? You are attempting to pickpocket me, aren't you?
- Imoen: Well, no... I just...
- Keldorn: Just what? Out with it girl. I won't have a party member stealing from me.
- Imoen: No, no, that's not it! I... I was just... I was just trying to find out if you're as muscular under your armour as you look. Oh, I know that you're married and all that Keldorn... but do you have *any* idea how good you look? I... I can't help myself, I just what to touch you all the time!
- Keldorn: Imoen! I... I have a daughter that is the same age as you!
- Imoen: I don't know what it is Keldorn, maybe it's the Bhaal essence in me. I just want to run my fingers through your hair and nibble on your ears! Oh, Keldorn, you drive me so wild!
- Keldorn: By Torm, no! This is terrible! I... I had no idea I had this effect on you...
- Imoen: Oh get over yourself already, Keldorn! Sheesh.
- [Imoen giggles]
- Imoen: Here's your ring back. I won't take it again, I promise.
- Protagonist: Might you have any advice, o Sentient Sword?
- Lilarcor: Advice, eh? Well, besides working a little on your swordsmanship. Besides that, I'd have to think. Hmmm... find someone rich, and kill them. Find someone richer, and kill them, too! Hack and slash you way to fortune! Woo-hoo!
- Aerie: I have a question for you, Imoen... you have the taint of Bhaal within you? Does this mean you will turn into the Slayer as well?
- Imoen: I certainly hope not. I... I've been thinking more and more lately about that, myself, though.
- Aerie: It must be an awful feeling. I cannot imagine how Protagonist deals with it.
- Imoen: Yeah... s/he's been dealing with it longer, too. Sometimes, when it's quiet... I can hear the taint in my heart whispering to me. It says awful things and I almost want to scream to shut them out.
- Aerie: [gasp!] You... you haven't done anything that it's said, have you?
- Imoen: Well... other than that time I got up in the middle of the night to snatch a bag of cinnamon cookies, heck no.
- Aerie: Oh, goo-... what? Cinnamon cookies?
- Imoen: Ha ha! Oh, come on, Aerie! Lighten up, willya? I'll tell ya what, if I have any desires to murder you in the middle of the night, you'll be the first to know, okay?
- Aerie: That's not very funny, Imoen. Protagonist never makes fun of his/her condition that way.
- Protagonist: Well, it's been so much easier when I discovered all the Slayer really wants is a sandwich...
- Aerie: Oh, fine. Everyone seems determined to make fun of me. I'll stand back here, thank you.
- Jon Irenicus: I cannot be caged. I cannot be controlled. Understand this as you die, ever pathetic, ever fools!
- Shadow Thief: No! I don't want to die!
- Jon Irenicus: Silence, dog. Your only purpose is to die by my hand.
- Minsc: I won't cry for the dead! I won't! Well, maybe a little... but I will staunch the tears with righteous fury!
- Minsc: Minsc will be free! These bonds will not hold my wrath! Butts will be liberally kicked in good measure!
- Minsc: This is silly! Buttons are not how one escapes dungeons! I would smash the button and rain beatings liberally down on the wizard for playing such a trick!
- Minsc: I would hate being forgotten in a bottle. It might depend somewhat on the type of bottle, but overall I expect the effect would be similar.
- Edwin: Well, it would seem the leader of our little group has impregnated the impressionable circus child. And here I thought she was merely getting chubby without the ring master's whip to keep her in shape.
- Lonk the Sane: My job? Taking care of crazies like you. Making sure you don't go and hurt yourselves with your deviant powers. And cookies, I make cookies.
- Viconia: Minsc, that tattoo on your face. Does it have tribal significance or did some nursery's fingerpainting class assault you with the blue pastels?
- Minsc: I do not like the tone of your voice, Dark Elf. The face I have is the face the ladies love! Boo loves Minsc's face, too! Don't you, Boo?
- Jon Irenicus: Life... is strength. That is not to be contested; it seems logical enough. You live; you affect your world.
- Dradeel: One has lots of time for reflection while waiting for the ENDLESS WAVES OF BAD DOGGIE WEREWOLF MONSTERS THAT CHEW YOUR TOES WHILE YOU SLEEP!
- Minsc: You should have given a sword, give a man a fish and he feeds himself for a day, give a man a sword and he can chow down on the ,eaty marrow of evil!
- Lilarcor: I'm sharp, I can come up with something... OK... find someone who knows what you want to know and threaten to kill them! Yeah! Then kill them! Woo-hoo!
- Lilarcor: I know! Start swinging! Eventually you'll lop off the head of someone important and then the good fights will REALLY start!
- Lilarcor: Err... find that wizard guy. Yeah... find him and kill him. Kill kill kill kill KILL! Whoo-hoo!
- Yoshimo: [after Edwin is transformed into a woman by the Nether Scroll] Tell me,Edwina, would you like me to let out the seams on your robe? I'm quite handy with a needle. You do, after all, have more... bulk... in the upper chest area.
- Edwina: [Slavic woman voice] Silence,you fool! Chauvinist pig!
- [mumbling]
- Edwina: what am I saying?
- [louder]
- Edwina: I mean to say IDIOT!
- Yoshimo: It was only an offer, m'lady. There is no cause for anger.
- Jon Irenicus: This woman had power, of a sort. She lost her parents to plague, her husband to war, but she persevered. She was well respected, her farm was prosperous and her children were well fed. And now she's dead.
- Jon Irenicus: Stand.
- Jon Irenicus: You rest each night uneasy. Yes, you are weary. You struggle daily.
- Jon Irenicus: It will not end, you know. Not until you acknowledge what you are.
- Jon Irenicus: You walk as a mortal, taking no advantage from your heritage, from your talents within. So many things of flesh are greater than you.
- Jon Irenicus: Walk among them, these beasts that are less than you are. See their strength; see how easily you fall to their muscle and skill.
- [shows the protagonist being slain by an enemy]
- Jon Irenicus: Why do you stand for this? Why do you submit to the flesh, when death is bred in your bones?
- Jon Irenicus: Do you realize the power you might hold? When the world of flesh is beneath you, even creatures mysterious and magical will fall!
- [shows the protagonist slaying multiple adversaries and laughing maniacally]
- Jon Irenicus: Follow, and receive the gift you are owed by the blood in your veins.
- Jon Irenicus: Follow, if only to protect the weak that fell because of you.
- Jan: Well, I suppose it's pretty safe to say that magic is most definitely involved here! No doubt about it. This reminds me of the time when Cousin Irony dabbled with a combination of illusions and wild magic. He never DID get his hair to stop opening portals to Baator. Well, not until the gryphon killed him, anyway.
- Protagonist: Ah, I see you still have that... rodent. Dare I ask how you have kept it hidden from our captors?
- Minsc: Don't ask questions better left to aged sages. Boo is so quick and evasive and there is ever so much of Minsc to search, there is no hope of getting us apart!
- Imoen: Eww, I... really don't want to think about that too much.
- Protagonist: Are you talking to a hamster? What kind of warrior are you?
- Minsc: I am the best kind of warrior! I am large and carry nature's favour with me wherever I go!
- Minsc: I trust those who prey on children no farther than they can be thrown, even if I manage to throw them pretty far!