- Martha Washington: Which cherry tree?
- George: I am glad you asked me that. Beyond the spacious skies, right at the amber waves of grain, east of the purple mound's majesty and right at the fruited plains. You can't miss it.
- Ebenezer Bartholomu: This here's my ex-wife. I really loved that one, degenerate bastard. And over there that's... that's my ex-wife 2. She died of the consumption. And that ex-wife died when I caught her in bed with Paul Revere, degenerate bastard. This here's my ex-wife. Boy could she... well that's another story, degenerate bastard. This here's my ex-wife. O ho ho, what I remember about her, degenerate pre-vert. There's my cousin Timmy. He likes small boys. We had to shoot him, degenerate bastard. Right over there's my brother Tom. Tom broke a leg at the age of a hundred and three leapin' out of a second story window, degenerate bastard.