Cast overview, first billed only: | |||
Pia Zadora | ... | Jerilee Randall | |
Lloyd Bochner | ... | Walter Thornton | |
Bibi Besch | ... | Veronica Randall | |
Joseph Cali | ... | Vincent Dacosta | |
Anthony Holland | ... | Guy Jackson | |
Jared Martin | ... | George Ballantine | |
Ray Liotta | ... | Joe Heron | |
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Carla Romanelli | ... | Carla Maria Peroni |
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Olivier Pierre | ... | George Fox |
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Kendal Kaldwell | ... | Joanne Castel |
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Lou Hirsch | ... | Bernie |
Kerry Shale | ... | Walter Thornton Jr. | |
Sandra Dickinson | ... | Nancy Day | |
Shane Rimmer | ... | Adolph Fannon | |
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Nancy Wood | ... | Janie |
Jerilee Randall, a simple schoolgirl living in the San Fernando Valley, dreams of becoming a famous screenwriter. She meets the son of a famous screenwriter at a party and accepts his invitation to come to his house. They drive away with some other people, and that night one of his friends assaults her with a garden hose. The attack is interrupted--just in time--by screenwriter Walter Thornton. Jerilee and Walter become friends, then fall in love and marry. Their marriage falls apart when Jerilee's script rewrites actually improve one of Walter's screenplays and he feels one-upped. Jerilee then tries to write her own screenplay and have it produced, which ends up involving her in endless sordid affairs. Written by Chris Holland <cholland@atlantic.net>
I haven't been able to decide if this movie is so bad it's good, or, to quote Enid Coleslaw, "so bad it's gone past good and back to bad again." No matter, it forced me look much the same way a pile of weird coloured vomit might, and it offers up a number of scenes that you won't forget even if you want to. There's a sneering young Ray Liotta telling a pigtailed Pia that her creative writing trophy looks like a penis. A bit later, there's Ray again, molesting Pia, not with the appropriately shaped trophy but a garden hose. There's a firm chinned Pia telling her domineering Mom that she wants to go to bed with Ray's geezer father, Walter. There's the actress in the graveyard scene yowling the best line ever written by Pia or anyone else: "WWWWHHHYYYYYYY!" There's that garden hose again, as Walter waves it Pia's face and roars "Is this more to your liking!?" There's Pia and her date so turned on by closeups of each other masticating salad that they start tearing each other's clothes off. There's Pia showering but forgetting to remove her dress. Perhaps best of all, there's Pia's typewriter, but instead of keys there are the miniature talking heads of those who have tormented her the most (afterwards, I was afraid to open my laptop). And finally there's Pia at "The Awards" exposing Hollywood for the cesspool it is, spitting out the second best line ever, "I guess I'm not the only one who has ever had to **** her way to the top." I see I have already spent more time commenting on "The Lonely Lady" than I have on far better pictures, so I'll quit. Be forewarned, though, that once you start watching you probably won't be able to take your eyes off the screen until two hours of your life have vanished forever.