- Interpreter: We found an Albanian Interpreter. However, he speaks only Romanian. So we had to get a Romanian. But he speaks only Serbian. The Serb speaks only Russian. The Russian only Czech. I, fortunately, speak Czech.
- Colonel Collins: I've just come from Mexico, General. Rodriguez is dead.
- General Pontaubert: Blast. How did it happen?
- Colonel Collins: He was devoured by a shark in a telephone booth, General.
- Bob Saint-Clair: Did they ever find the shark that devoured Rodriguez?
- Tatiana: Yes, it turned up in a canning factory.
- Tatiana: What is it?
- Bob Saint-Clair: My hollow tooth. I've lost my cyanide capsule. That's never happened to me before when I kissed a woman. Good lord, where is it?
- Tatiana: I spit it out. Naturally.