- I love Scrubs (2001). It's the best day job in the world.
- I love The Office (2001). I think it's the funniest thing - Ricky Gervais is possibly the funniest person I've seen in my entire life.
- [on working with Woody Allen] That was a very surreal experience: I had studied the script right down to the punctuation marks, and then he would say, "We're not going to say what's on the page, and you don't really have to, either. Try to keep up".
- [on Hollywood's initial response to his Garden State (2004) script] Everyone said no. Everyone with a date book and a phone in Los Angeles said no.
- [on casting Natalie Portman in Garden State (2004)] When you are writing a script, you can't help but stop and daydream about which actors are going to play the parts, and I kind of imagined Natalie Portman. Not just because she is beautiful, because obviously she is, but she is a wonderful actress who hasn't had a chance in a long time to show the world how talented she is.
- Everyone has an idea that they think would be a great movie. Everyone has a cousin who they think you should work with. Everyone has a warped vision of Hollywood and what success in Hollywood is like. That you love cocaine and that you spend every night in orgies with models. If only it were true.
- [Responding to E! Ted Casablanca, when asked what he thinks of studio heads] They put all this money into these huge movies, and then no one goes to see them . . . That sort of shows that they're out of touch. Then, everyone in town passes on my little movie, and it does really well.
- My mother's a psychologist, my stepfather's a psychologist, my stepmother is a therapist and my dad's a lawyer. So it was all prominent in my life. I don't know anyone who doesn't know someone on some form of prescription medicine.
- I was kosher until I had my Bar Mitzvah, and I parlayed officially becoming a man into telling my father I wanted to eat cheeseburgers.
- [6/25/07, on his MySpace.com Blog] I'm not sure when or why the tabloid angle on me was decided that I am a cad. I would have much rather it had been that I am secretly a dentist or that I love soup. I am, in fact, merely doing what every other single 32-year-old man in NYC is doing this summer. I am dating. If you must read that stuff, please don't digest it as fact. It is probably one of the only real shitty things one has to get used to when living in the public eye, but I suppose one of the benefits of this blog is that you can hear it directly from me. [on his MySpace.com Blog] [25 June 2007]
- [on his mother's conversion to Judaism] Well, my mom converted - she was Protestant - so she doesn't have any of the stereotypical attributes of a Jewish mother. But she's amazing. I got all the benefits of having an amazing Jewish mom without having any of the annoying things. I'm a total momma's boy.
- I think - not to push this on anyone - that this is the life we have. There is no afterlife and there's no cloud that we get to sit on and read the paper. When I fold that into the search for my own spirituality, I want to seize the day. I want to live each moment. I want to make the most of it, because this is it.
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