My 2023 Movie Reviews
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- DirectorGerard JohnstoneStarsAllison WilliamsViolet McGrawRonny ChiengA robotics engineer at a toy company builds a life-like doll that begins to take on a life of its own.***1/2: Funny how M3gan was pretty much the Child’s Play remake but with a girl robot doll. Yet, it was actually better than that movie.
Despite being everything I expected the movie kept my attention throughout. Due to plenty of good dark humor and a smart script. That is a smart story about dealing with loss. - DirectorRussell MulcahyStarsTyler PoseyCrystal ReedHolland RodenA terrifying evil has emerged. The wolves howl once again, but only a Werewolf like Scott McCall, can gather both new allies and reunite trusted friends to fight back against what could be the most powerful and deadliest enemy.
- DirectorPeyton ReedStarsPaul RuddEvangeline LillyMichael DouglasScott Lang and Hope Van Dyne are dragged into the Quantum Realm, along with Hope's parents and Scott's daughter Cassie. Together they must find a way to escape, but what secrets is Hope's mother hiding? And who is the mysterious Kang?***: It is a pretty entertaining movie, that is at least better than the second movie. That has way higher reviews than it. Since for one the villain is far superior.
The movie just gets sillier lines as it goes on with less of the jokes landing. Also yes the movie isn’t oozing in originality. The movie is Journey to the Center of Earth meets Tron Legacy, with Ant-Man. - DirectorElizabeth BanksStarsKeri RussellAlden EhrenreichO'Shea Jackson Jr.An oddball group of cops, criminals, tourists and teens converge on a Georgia forest where a huge black bear goes on a murderous rampage after unintentionally ingesting cocaine.***: The bear in real life, was found dead after getting high on cocaine. She didn’t go on a killing spree.
In this goofy but entertaining Horror/Comedy the bear does of course go on a killing spree. After getting high on cocaine that was thrown out of a plane.
The film is also more of a crime comedy than you’d expect. Sort in a Get Shorty sort of way. - DirectorMichael B. JordanStarsMichael B. JordanTessa ThompsonJonathan MajorsAdonis has been thriving in both his career and family life, but when a childhood friend and former boxing prodigy resurfaces, the face-off is more than just a fight.***: The performances and story make up for weak boxing scenes. With some even counting too much on CGI.
- DirectorMatt Bettinelli-OlpinTyler GillettStarsCourteney CoxMelissa BarreraJenna OrtegaIn the next installment, the survivors of the Ghostface killings leave Woodsboro behind and start a fresh chapter in New York City.***: A fun movie with some brutal kills. Is held back from greatness due to a underwhelming killer reveal. As well as being too generous who how many people survived from their wounds.
- DirectorDavid F. SandbergStarsZachary LeviAsher AngelJack Dylan GrazerThe film continues the story of teenage Billy Batson who, upon reciting the magic word "SHAZAM!" is transformed into his adult Super Hero alter ego, Shazam.***: My niece had the same opinion as me. The movie was as entertaining as it was stupid. Spoiler: it’s cameo especially is awkward and out of nowhere. That just added to the fun stupidity though. The movie isn’t as fun as the first film though. Which also had a superior villain.
- DirectorChad StahelskiStarsKeanu ReevesLaurence FishburneGeorge GeorgiouJohn Wick uncovers a path to defeating The High Table. But before he can earn his freedom, Wick must face off against a new enemy with powerful alliances across the globe and forces that turn old friends into foes.***1/2: John Wick 4 is half the usual bad ass John Wick with great fights and shootouts. Yet, the film also feels like a epic Western as well.
- DirectorJohn Francis DaleyJonathan GoldsteinStarsChris PineMichelle RodriguezRegé-Jean PageA charming thief and a band of unlikely adventurers embark on an epic quest to retrieve a lost relic, but things go dangerously awry when they run afoul of the wrong people.A fun and witty Fantasy Adventure. That despite how bad the trailers were. Dungeons and Dragons is one of the best Fantasy films in recent years. ***1/2
- DirectorAaron HorvathMichael JelenicPierre LeducStarsChris PrattAnya Taylor-JoyCharlie DayA plumber named Mario travels through an underground labyrinth with his brother Luigi, trying to save a captured princess.***: A Mario adaptation made for the fans. So of course a lot of stiff critics hated the movie. Not only Mario fans but Nintendo players should enjoy the movie as well.
Since there’s Easter eggs for other Nintendo games as well. Like Luigi’s Mansion and Kid Icarus. - DirectorChris McKayStarsNicholas HoultNicolas CageAwkwafinaRenfield, Dracula's henchman and inmate at the lunatic asylum for decades, longs for a life away from the Count, his various demands, and all of the bloodshed that comes with them.
- DirectorLee CroninStarsMirabai PeaseRichard CrouchleyAnna-Maree ThomasA twisted tale of two estranged sisters whose reunion is cut short by the rise of flesh-possessing demons, thrusting them into a primal battle for survival as they face the most nightmarish version of family imaginable.***
- DirectorJames GunnStarsChris PrattChukwudi IwujiBradley CooperStill reeling from the loss of Gamora, Peter Quill rallies his team to defend the universe and one of their own - a mission that could mean the end of the Guardians if not successful.***1/2: Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 3 is pretty close to the best one. Despite not really being strong on story. The film makes you forget that though due to plenty of heart and humor.
I’m happy to say you’re going to leave smiling and not crying your eyes out, like I expected. - DirectorLouis LeterrierJustin LinStarsVin DieselMichelle RodriguezJason StathamDom Toretto and his family are targeted by the vengeful son of drug kingpin Hernan Reyes.***: This is one the best and most fun of the Fast and Furious sequels. Yet this is when critics and even most fans had enough. It made the less at the box office and the reviews were low.
Jason Mamoa since Slumberland has learned to have more fun in his movies. He easily steals the show as the villain who blames Dom (Vin Diesel) for his father’s death. - DirectorRob MarshallStarsHalle BaileyJonah Hauer-KingMelissa McCarthyA young mermaid makes a deal with a sea witch to trade her beautiful voice for human legs so she can discover the world above water and impress a prince.
- DirectorJoaquim Dos SantosKemp PowersJustin K. ThompsonStarsShameik MooreHailee SteinfeldBrian Tyree HenryMiles Morales catapults across the multiverse, where he encounters a team of Spider-People charged with protecting its very existence. When the heroes clash on how to handle a new threat, Miles must redefine what it means to be a hero.****: A great emotional rollercoaster. That takes awhile to get going but is fantastic when it does.
- DirectorSteven Caple Jr.StarsAnthony RamosDominique FishbackLuna Lauren VelezDuring the '90s, a new faction of Transformers - the Maximals - join the Autobots as allies in the battle for Earth.***: The best next to Bumblebee and the first Michael Bay Transformers. Which isn’t saying a lot since the movie has its corny moments.
The Transformers get more to do than just blow shit up and feel more like characters than they did in the Michael Bay sequels. The movie feels more like the cartoon series. Though some lines are so cheesy that yes they felt like they came straight from the show.
The movies are finally figuring out what works. Which is sad since critics and probably even some fans are tired of Transformers after 4 brainless Transformer sequels. - DirectorAndy MuschiettiStarsEzra MillerMichael KeatonSasha CalleBarry Allen uses his super speed to change the past, but his attempt to save his family creates a world without super heroes, forcing him to race for his life in order to save the future.***: An entertaining and fun movie that falls apart a little in the end and almost becomes pointless. Though the movie is a bit of a letdown next to the trailers. It is way better than the mushy and corny love fest the Flash tv show turned into.
Two Ezra’s is definitely as annoying as you’d expect. The longer hair one eventually becomes tolerable but it takes half the movie.
Spoiler Warning: Michael Keaton and Sasha Calle steal the show but by the end it is a little disappointing how ether were used.
Andy Muschietti is a fine director but unfortunately it’s more of the Muschietti who did IT Chapter 2, than the one who did Chapter 1. So there’s a combination of goofiness, drama, some dark moments and back to goofy again. - DirectorJosh GreenbaumStarsWill FerrellJamie FoxxIsla FisherAn abandoned dog teams up with other strays to get revenge on his former owner.
- DirectorJames MangoldStarsHarrison FordPhoebe Waller-BridgeAntonio BanderasArchaeologist Indiana Jones races against time to retrieve a legendary artifact that can change the course of history.***: The underwhelming ending of Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny is better If you come in thinking that the lame rumored ending is true.
Otherwise such an action packed adventure needed a more exciting ending. That is at least better than the ending that some fan on crack made up. That Indiana Jones erases himself to make it his goddaughter Helena Shaw (Phoebe Waller-Bridge) who went on all his adventures all along.
A lot of fans weren’t excited because they actually expected that ending. Thinking they knew for sure that was the ending.
Thank god it isn’t but the one we got is kind of cute and heartwarming, just underwhelming. Now that I got that out of the way. The movie feels like a more old school Indiana Jones adventure than Crystal Skull.
Indiana also isn’t pushed aside so his Helena Shaw gets all the action. He actually gets more if you count the CGI beginning.
While Mads Mikkelsen (Hannibal) was made to be a villain in an Indiana Jones film. Toby Jones is also perfectly cast as an Indy sidekick in the 1930’s.
Phoebe Waller-Bridge is well cast and has the look of an actress from the 30-60’s. You’re just not going to like her throughout if you think she is there to steal the franchise.
Which it is dumb if anyone thought that. When Harrison Ford will never ever let anyone replace him as Indiana Jones - DirectorChristopher McQuarrieStarsTom CruiseHayley AtwellVing RhamesEthan Hunt and his IMF team must track down a dangerous weapon before it falls into the wrong hands.
- DirectorChristopher NolanStarsCillian MurphyEmily BluntMatt DamonThe story of American scientist J. Robert Oppenheimer and his role in the development of the atomic bomb.
- DirectorGreta GerwigStarsMargot RobbieRyan GoslingIssa RaeBarbie and Ken are having the time of their lives in the colorful and seemingly perfect world of Barbie Land. However, when they get a chance to go to the real world, they soon discover the joys and perils of living among humans.
- DirectorNia DaCostaStarsBrie LarsonTeyonah ParrisIman VellaniCarol Danvers gets her powers entangled with those of Kamala Khan and Monica Rambeau, forcing them to work together to save the universe.
- DirectorBen WheatleyStarsJason StathamJing WuShuya Sophia CaiA research team encounters multiple threats while exploring the depths of the ocean, including a malevolent mining operation.
- DirectorJeff RoweKyler SpearsStarsMicah AbbeyShamon Brown Jr.Nicolas CantuThe Turtle brothers work to earn the love of New York City while facing down an army of mutants.
- DirectorJustin SimienStarsLaKeith StanfieldRosario DawsonOwen WilsonA single mom named Gabbie hires a tour guide, a psychic, a priest and a historian to help exorcise her newly bought mansion after discovering it is inhabited by ghosts.***: Better than the 2003 movie in some ways. Though that movie also has it’s superior aspects. The actors are so entertaining here that you don’t think until afterwards. About how the film doesn’t entirely make full use of the mansion.
The 2003 movies that has 13% good reviews on Rotten Tomatoes. Actually made better use of the house and even had the singing heads.
Though this film does do better getting more laughs than the 2003 film. Neither are scary enough though. - DirectorAntoine FuquaStarsDenzel WashingtonDakota FanningEugenio MastrandreaRobert McCall finds himself at home in Southern Italy but he discovers his friends are under the control of local crime bosses. As events turn deadly, McCall knows what he has to do: become his friends' protector by taking on the mafia.
- DirectorScott WaughStarsJason Statham50 CentMegan FoxArmed with every weapon they can get their hands on, the Expendables are the world's last line of defense and the team that gets called when all other options are off the table.
- DirectorDenis VilleneuveStarsTimothée ChalametZendayaRebecca FergusonPaul Atreides unites with Chani and the Fremen while seeking revenge against the conspirators who destroyed his family.
- DirectorWalt DohrnTim HeitzStarsAnna KendrickJustin TimberlakeKenan ThompsonPoppy discovers that Branch was once part of the boy band 'BroZone' with his brothers, Floyd, John Dory, Spruce and Clay. When Floyd is kidnapped, Branch and Poppy embark on a journey to reunite his two other brothers and rescue Floyd.
- DirectorFrancis LawrenceStarsRachel ZeglerTom BlythViola DavisCoriolanus Snow mentors and develops feelings for the female District 12 tribute during the 10th Hunger Games.
- DirectorPaul KingStarsTimothée ChalametGustave DieMurray McArthurWith dreams of opening a shop in a city renowned for its chocolate, a young and poor Willy Wonka discovers that the industry is run by a cartel of greedy chocolatiers.
- DirectorJames WanStarsJason MomoaPatrick WilsonYahya Abdul-Mateen IIBlack Manta seeks revenge on Aquaman for his father's death. Wielding the Black Trident's power, he becomes a formidable foe. To defend Atlantis, Aquaman forges an alliance with his imprisoned brother. They must protect the kingdom.
- DirectorM. Night ShyamalanStarsDave BautistaJonathan GroffBen AldridgeWhile vacationing, a girl and her parents are taken hostage by armed strangers who demand that the family make a choice to avert the apocalypse.***: The trailers didn’t leave much for the imagination. No Sixth Sense like twist exists that will leave you shocked.
With that said A Knock At The Cabin is still one of Shymalan’s better movies. He has done worse movies where he seems to enjoy getting robotic performances out of people. Even Mark Wahlberg and Will Smith.
There’s at least no robotic performance and way better dialogue than Wahlberg had in the Happening. Even if I can’t say the trailers didn’t tell most of what to expect. - DirectorJeremy GarelickStarsAdam SandlerJennifer AnistonMark StrongFull-time detectives Nick and Audrey are struggling to get their private eye agency off the ground. They find themselves at the center of international abduction when their friend Maharaja is kidnapped at his own lavish wedding.***: In some ways better than the first film. Though that was a less predictable whodunnit. Spoiler Alert: Since Mark Strong has been the villain so much. Casting him in a whodunnit made it predictable.