The 20 Worst Movies I Saw in 2010
As a comedic follow-up to The 20 Best Movies I Saw in 2010, these really are the worst of the worst, but I am more just trying to flex my comedy writing skills.
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- DirectorMatt ReevesStarsMike VogelJessica LucasLizzy CaplanA group of friends venture deep into the streets of New York on a rescue mission during a rampaging monster attack.How Cloverfield is even called a movie, I'm not sure. It really is just a home video of people screaming and shots of feet as people are running. Personal home videos aren't this bad.
- DirectorAnand TuckerStarsAmy AdamsMatthew GoodeAdam ScottAnna Brady plans to travel to Dublin, Ireland to propose to her boyfriend Jeremy on February 29, leap day, because, according to Irish tradition, a man who receives a marriage proposal on a leap day must accept it.Leap Year managed to create one of the least likable romantic comedy heroines ever. They also couldn't get somebody like me, a romantic comedy junky and their target audience, to even give it a passing grade. I couldn't sleep I was so mad that they tricked me into watching this which had nothing romantic or funny about it.
- DirectorAlison ReidStarsAngela VintMegan FahlenbockRosemary DunsmoreA family uproar is caused when a scientific breakthrough allows lesbian couple Athena and Lilith to have each other's child.The worst of the worst of Canadian independent film. They took a great, smart premise and turned it into something that was mind-numbingly stupid, didn't make sense, and wasn't funny. They also didn't even give me any characters to care about.
- DirectorJacob ChaseStarsDaniel CarlisleTodd KubrakEmily PeckTwo couples in their twenties, who are struggling to find substance and meaning in their lives and relationships, meet by happenstance in a New York City Irish tavern called The Four-Faced Liar.It took me a long time to figure out the point of this film, as it was just college students waxing on poetically about love and relationships, but I have decided they were trying to make an edgier and indie version of "Friends". It didn't work. Mainly because they didn't have a plot, or story-line, or anything funny. But what pissed me off the most about this film is that they don't even know how to count. The title, poster and plot description refer to four main characters, but there were five. It featured one couple moving in together, one engaged couple, and their lesbian best friend. That would be five characters, and the cast list does have five actors as the main cast. I would hate to be the one insignificant one.
- DirectorBarry LevinsonStarsRichard AbramowitzStephen BaldwinAnnette BeningAn in-depth look at the Democratic and Republican national conventions held during the 2008 U.S. Presidential election year.I hate to say it, but apparently Barry Levinson has forgotten how to direct. This is not a documentary because there is nothing interesting or educational about this, and barely anything that relates directly to Politics and Hollywood, which this is supposed to be about.
- DirectorRoger KumbleStarsRaven-SymonéMartin LawrenceKym WhitleyWhen an overachieving high school student decides to travel around the country to choose the perfect college, her overprotective cop father decides to accompany her to keep her on the straight and narrow.Another example of a movie with problems relating to its title. There is nothing of value in this film that relates to college in anyway, nothing about travelling on any kind of road, and nothing about taking any kind of trip. A misnomer if ever I did see one.
- StarsSarah ChalkeJudy GreerPhilip WinchesterAn enterprising young woman navigates the professional waters of Beverly Hills in order to land the hottest producer in town, fully unaware that she is about to get in way over her head.The one good thing I can say about Maneater is at least the plot description was accurate: Horrified that she is still single at 32, a socialite hatches a plan to make a hot Hollywood film-maker fall in love with her. Horrified is right. And there are even twists, but that's only because you can't imagine that anybody could behave like this.
- DirectorPierre MorelStarsJohn TravoltaJonathan Rhys MeyersKasia SmutniakIn Paris, a young employee in the office of the US Ambassador hooks up with an American spy looking to stop a terrorist attack in the city.I guess this is a typical action movie. But the plot makes no sense, and all there is, is machine gun firing with dead bodies flying and blood squirting. Not my idea of a good film.
- DirectorLarry CharlesStarsSacha Baron CohenGustaf HammarstenClifford BañagaleFlamboyant, gay Austrian Brüno looks for new fame in America.Borat was particularly adept at cornering people into doing and saying stupid things, but Bruno went too far. He acted completely incoherently and insane and the comedy was lost.
- DirectorNicholas StollerStarsJonah HillRussell BrandElisabeth MossA record company intern is hired to accompany out-of-control British rock star Aldous Snow to a concert at L.A.'s Greek Theater.Get Him to the Greek was supposed to be a character spin-off of Forgetting Sarah Marshall, but the problem is Forgetting Sarah Marshall actually had characters, this film did not. They just took the same names and tried to copy some jokes and thought that would be enough. But it's not good enough for me.
- DirectorMark Steven JohnsonStarsKristen BellJosh DuhamelAnjelica HustonBeth is an ambitious young New Yorker who is completely unlucky in love. On a whirlwind trip to Rome, she impulsively steals some coins from a reputed fountain of love, and is then aggressively pursued by a band of suitors.Contrary to the previous romantic comedies that made this list, When in Rome actually had reasonable lead characters. But it didn't have any writing. They just made up jokes and plot twists as they went along, so nothing was funny nor made any sense.
- DirectorRick FamuyiwaStarsAmerica FerreraForest WhitakerCarlos MenciaThe weeks leading up to a young couple's wedding are comic and stressful, especially as their respective fathers try to lay their long standing feud to rest.The problem with our family wedding is that they thought characters acting in horrible ways was funny, but they were just rude, incorrigible and horrible people. I certainly wasn't laughing.
- DirectorGary WinickStarsAmanda SeyfriedGael García BernalVanessa RedgraveSophie travels to Verona where she finds an old unanswered letter asking for love advice. She answers it and when the recipient shows up along with her grumpy grandson, they head off to find the old long lost love while a young love sparksLetters to Juliet failed because the writers failed to realize that honourable people tend to be in relationships for more than just looks. They failed to add anything interesting to our main character and they failed to give any good qualities to the men in her life. Just because Christopher Egan and Gael Garcia Bernal are good looking isn't enough for me.
- DirectorBradley Rust GrayStarsZoe KazanMark RendallMaryann UrbanoOn a summer break from college, a young epileptic woman struggles to balance her feelings for her fledgling boyfriend while her friend Al crashes with her for the season.I do actually feel bad about putting The Exploding Girl on a "worst movies" list, but I have had enough with New York City being its own character in films. Yes, New York is loud, fast, and busy with lots of traffic and construction, but that doesn't mean it needs to make up the soundtrack. I like slow, subtle character studies just as much as the next person, but this would be an example of too slow and subtle.
- DirectorMitchell LichtensteinStarsParker PoseyDemi MooreRip TornTwo sisters return home to deal with their ailing father, only to face some surprising situations.Now I don't always like dysfunctional family dramedies as much as the next person, but I can usually tolerate them. But the comedy was too absurd, the drama was too melodramatic, and all the individualistic differences that the film-makers added just didn't work for me.
- DirectorBrooks BranchStarsTimothy HuttonMira SorvinoDana DelanyNYC, 1979: Gabriel and Annie's marriage is falling apart with only their daughter holding it together. Gabriel quits his architect job to become a playwright, writing about his life. Annie and Liz leave.Main character is a writer? fine. Main character is having a mid-life crisis? fine. Main character is going to find himself through films, plays and writing? great. I'm happy with all of that, but only if they actually gave me a main character that was a writer having a mid-life crisis and was going to find himself through films, plays and writing. But all I got as a boring and confusing mess about some guy crossing the line of fidelity.
- DirectorNia VardalosStarsNia VardalosJohn CorbettJudah FriedlanderA florist, who abides by a strict five-date limit with any man, finds herself wanting more with the new restaurateur in town.I like Nia Vardalos and love John Corbett as much as anybody, but this didn't show off any of their skills. Corbett's character was one-dimensional and boring, and as simple as the premise was I couldn't figure out if Vardalos' character actually loved or hated Valentine's day, but it was more that I just didn't care.
- DirectorAndré van HeerdenStarsKevin SorboKatherine AlbrechtKerby AndersonFrom the very nature of truth to how our world began, from morality to religion, from population control to political correctness, from Israel to Islam, from atheism to God... our entire world runs on what we believe.12 Biggest Lies is as boring a documentary as you could possibly make. This is just for philosophy majors and lawyers arguing the semantics of truth. And you can't even argue back with your TV, so it can't be much fun for them either.
- DirectorThor FreudenthalStarsZachary GordonRobert CapronRachael HarrisGreg Heffley is a 12 year old who is fresh out of elementary and transitions to middle school, where he has to learn the consequences and responsibility to survive the year.Diary of a Wimpy Kid had a great poster, a great tag line, and a great premise. But unfortunately, they just couldn't deliver. The main wimpy kid was too desperate, selfish and annoying and made it too hard for anybody to relate to him or care for him.
- DirectorRichard CurtisStarsPhilip Seymour HoffmanBill NighyNick FrostA band of rogue DJs that captivated Britain, playing the music that defined a generation and standing up to a government that wanted classical music, and nothing else, on the airwaves.Also known as "Pirate Radio", this film makes the list because they took one of the most interesting times in music history and ruined it for everybody. A time when rock was banned on radio, and yet was immensely popular, drove British bands across the pond, and dominated advertising ratings. And what did this film do? Turned it into a boring, sex, drugs and rock n roll coming-of-age story. The big problem is because it was such a big budget, big film release, this story will be out-of-bounds for any future film-makers.