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- Matt regains consciousness (watch Episode Two) and goes outside to discover mustachioed man, Bruce, attempting to break into Cassie's car. When Cassie and Donnie emerge, Cassie's quick on the draw and, well, everybody gets maced. More hell breaks loose.
- Coming home from the Antiques Roadtrip with an unexpected treasure worth 1.2 million dollars, Donnie discovers that he's been followed by a strange man with a fake mustache. He and his roommate, Matt, must guard the fort. Mormons come a-knockin'.
- Donnie and Matt high-tail it out of there in mustachioed man's car and head to Donnie's sister Cassie's house to figure out what to do with the kidnap victim in the trunk (watch Episode One for clarification). More hell breaks loose when the kidnapped girl, Indiana, turns out to be not so much a victim after all.